Reddit Haikus

it's sort of a look
     at the way the two human
cultures would diverge.

He had done something
     similar to her and his
dad a few years back.

Karma is a bitch.
     Actually a story about
my older brother.

The short snout provides
     amazing leverage, giving
tremendous bite strength.

Fantastic progress!
     [deleted] And one point! snakes,
or cats, or herons.

The honors kids were
     just bored all the time and turned
into delinquents.

(J) also proceeds
     to lay on the bed, and then
claims it as his own.

As the website said
     They probably think a certain
song is about them.

All my rage! I cracked
     up when I saw this and when
I showed my boyfriend.

I think the only
     reason i stay was for James
Franco's performance.

this also isn't
     my first rabbit nor the first
to enjoy this treat.

It doesn't only
     start when you decide to be
legal about it.

But really your not
     helping me at all with this.
I deserve to know!

That one week made me
     realize how twisted and two
faced people can be.

That's one of the first
     misconceptions of going
into the service.

I have more than OP
     and got most of mine from when
I worked at Walmart.

How did it slide off
     the roof and IN the window
during a corner.

I still consider
     this the hottest video
on the internet.

you can believe what
     you want Hi, I'd really like
to join your server.

Or they could just be
     defaulted on, but people
don't like doing that.

The trilogy on
     the other hand, makes the whole
thing manageable.

Any resources
     to figure out where you can
help and who needs help?

And it seems that we've
     blown it twice in OT this year.
I mean, what the fuck?

I didn't see it! Link?
     The Black Knight looks AMAZING
with Tart with a Heart.

I can't stand my race
     boots unless I'm bashing gates
or carving trenches.

Unfortunately,
     you simply cannot have one
without the other.

Or the fact that there
     were only two people shown
that were doing this.

I guess you're probably
     pretty focused on the whole
"impending death" thing.

There are things that need
     tweaking in every game, may
as well make it known.

I'm so happy Mike
     G came out from under his
rock for a feature.

[deleted] You know
     what they say about people
with small hands. Small gloves.

Great post, thank you. Thanks!
     You're a good person. A twist:
Bury the hatchet.

And im guessing you
     won't like that At least you were
working hard... Poor thing!

But guess what, you got
     the app out more quickly than
you could on your own.

You have to look HARD
     sometimes to find it, but there's
always a reason.

No male role model.
     And he's made sticking around
totally worth it.

If you don't value
     these things, factual claims are
meaningless to you).

The good cheaters you
     have no idea (or can't
prove they) are cheating.

I'm a Racist. Which,
     means I actually prefer you
to other people.

we're all gay so us
     see each other jack off would
be stimulating.

You can certainly
     eat subway salads if you
pick the right dressings.

Probably not enough
     people here are old enough
to have 'made it' yet.

WE NEED A GOOD GIRL
     COLLEGE LIBERAL MACRO nope,
not enough freedom.

Do you have a way
     you plan on trying to separate
the urea out?

Thank you Wait so if
     you get fouled in the box you
get a shot on goal?

If something cannot
     be proven it does not mean
that is isn't true.

Jammed my Gauss rifles
     up his Hunchback chin and blew
his cockpit away.

Now I need new spots...
     yes and i loved it I would
live my life the same.

Sheer terror for some
     reason I just new he was
evil (in the dream).

Shrimp is delicious
     I love to see that color
in the ring. Great job!

This is what I thought
     during the whole time reading.
go to the doctor.

Then one day I got
     so angry because he WOULD
NOT STOP biting me.

I'm glad that you don't
     seem offended by the tough
love I offered up.

Firing a rifle
     into the air while balls deep
in a squealing hog.

I'm not a nice guy,
     I'm not a bad guy, I'm not
any kind of guy.

But Detox doesn't
     seem like the kind of person
to buy into that.

I needed just one
     good story before I tucked
myself into bed.

One night she slid out
     in the rain and smacked the rear
wheel into a curb.

The story loses
     structure towards the end and some
things could have been cut.

Its too bad that such
     incidents don't legally
justify assault.

How would dinosaurs
     be a threat to a modern
military force?

It's so frustrating!!
     Blueberry Swisher Sweet blunt
wraps are my favorites.

If only that was
     something we could readily
see in the night sky.

Oh she also talks
     about how that was the first
time time they made love.

The feet are lightly
     hit with a feather (i think)
every few seconds.

For instance running
     out to the car in the rain
or across the street.

It's cool all the things
     you can see and hear, but it's
the same every time.

I don't know. They do
     have somewhat of a hold on
our government though.

i appreciate
     your question and you bring up
some interesting points.

I suppose I should
     be ok with my results
with "lazy" keto.

I usually leave
     my books behind though, perhaps
I've been too trusting.

In case anyone
     was wondering while reading
this, I am a man.

The colony had
     received your last transmission
before it ruptured.

Good question. Depends.
     I'm guessing it'll be a Don
DeLillo book, though.

I agree. I do
     hope we find out one way or
the other soon, though.

I find it drives me.
     I cant stand reality
shows or most sitcoms.

Do you not realize
     that *none of them* claim that no
deity exists?

Just because someone
     *isn't supposed* to rape you
doesn't mean they won't.

I've happily watched
     Saving Private Ryan more
than a dozen times.

There are two common
     solutions, the first being
crappy but easy.

Prep school kids are, well,
     more likely to be prepared
for the next level.

Ninja Horse? Yes please.
     Sorry bud, it's on a site
you've gotta pay for.

Thank you for sharing.
     Note the uses of the word
'pub' and British pounds.

Well, I think molten
     plastic all over my face
would be pretty bad.

We're not conversing,
     you're trying to get the upper
hand for approval.

Same here. My brother
     was always a complete jerk
when we were younger.

Interestingly,
     I watched the exact opposite
happen with my dog.

Nice, very 90's meant
     in a good way [deleted]
What would they be like?

I just made a post
     on the tech support forums.
It's a strange issue.

I still think about
     what I would do if I had
that money today.

(starts fight) falls (loses
     half health) bastard stray demon
one shots you. Fucking!

Gotta love karma.
     Mid april you say? Can't wait
to buy it in June.

At this stage i think
     the main thing that matters is
the entertainment.

I don't care about
     the inner workings of some
random message board.

I work there and they've
     never gotten on to me
for accepting tips.

Is there some list you're
     getting this info from or
just experience?

Also, drink your milk
     and eat your broccoli so you
can grow big and strong.

On the other hand
     the minor seventh chords sound
really cool as well.

I've actually never
     seen that one but I have seen
Army of darkness.

And for anyone
     who was curious, my dad
knew what to expect.

Light pressure readies
     the machine and following
through takes the image.

Go to class, get out
     to message him and find out
he deleted me.

If you have many
     cards like we all did then you
will make a lot Yep!

Such a jerk how do
     the players in those subs get
around this issue?

I will ask the old
     man what he uses on his
as soon as I can.

And by this logic,
     she would just keep growing flesh
the older she got.

[deleted] I think
     rapists should be shot on site.
Execution style.

That's informative.
     Thanks for doing the research!
Are as lost as me?

Also, the early
     version isn't colored like
the Marvel reprint.

Born in Japan, raised
     going back and forth between
Japan and the US.

However, I didn't
     think the Heston parody
and song were so bad.

My brain is confused
     at this set of images.
Truly mind blowing.

Please. We are given
     no respect by the upper
ranks OR the lower.

Being a novice
     is no reason to not read
the rules of a post.

Period. I'm sad
     to see Link's Awakening
so low on your list.

OJ dunked the ball
     and threw it into the crowd
and got ejected.

Holy shit, I didn't
     notice that at all until
I read your comment.

I haven't noticed
     any of those signs, and I'm
OSHA certified.

Just searched that, if it's
     the beach one then that's not what
I was thinking of..

I understand, though
     I feel the seeds of heartbreak
beginning to sprout.

-Polio Vaccine
     Learned this the hard way. My eyes
were completely red.

(Surprised no one has
     said that yet) Yeah, Robin is
pretty bad sometimes.

I live in northern
     Canada, and dry winters
are the death of me.

Why not limit what
     you can buy to 24oz a day
via your ID card?

I just can't stand it,
     and there are a million songs
about the same thing.

And you're right, there are
     some really, really stupid
people out there *cough*.

You aren't the only
     person in the wastes who wants
to own a sweet ride.

WHY ARENT THE WIRES
     SYMMETRICAL!! WHY ARE YOU
DOING THIS TO ME!

thanks for the support,
     everyone, it honestly
means a lot to me.

ill update again
     soon, hopefully with some more
positive updates!

I was done after
     my first contract. I didn't care.
I just wanted out.

I just wanted out.
     Yes. They are stored until you
purchase the game. Yes.

Pretty please? Wait are
     you living in Panther or
in Pennsylvania?

The two groups who were
     prayed for did worse than the group
that wasn't prayed for.

I don't want karma
     nor do I need catchy or
witty responses.

I couldn't even
     wrap my head around how I'd
feel if it were switched..

Are you suggesting
     two men that get married would
have inbred children?

It's a miracle!
     Does this policy apply
to bird feeders too?

Then one could argue
     that god manipulated
said natural forces.

I literally felt
     sick to my stomach and left
the bar right away.

It really depends
     on what these creatures are (if
indeed they are real).

Or else it may be
     facing ratio or toon
shader of some kind.

He seemed especially
     jealous of Micky and more
interested in her.

Do you have any
     idea what Wall Street would
do with that money?

EDIT: Also, glad
     to hear you've been enjoying
my other writing.

What hotel are you
     at where there are stickers on
your wall in your room?

She told us we were
     being stupid and to go
clean everything up.

The customer would
     be causing a problem by
not leaving a tip.

Mostly because all
     the people who THINK they can
beat me up. They can't.

(We could even get
     rid of it entirely,
and make 'called shot' stunts.

Understood, although
     I realize my phrasing may
have been misleading.

Kind of hard to pass
     ay laws when half the country
thinks god will fix it.

but don't say he didn't
     do his job, because he did
and he did it well.

I came here for all
     the hate and there was only
one guy talking shit.

Differential oil
     can be a bitch if you use
too much. Black people.

He takes a few shots
     before the red splash appears
on his hopper. Out.

If everyone had
     the same opinion it would
be a boring world.

I'm just a patient
     Now give those damn drugs to me
I'm down. Let's do this.

We played for a draw,
     must be why we subbed all those
attackers on huh?

Except that it's dead.
     The whole point is he doesn't
want to type out why.

Oh! New kind of dick,
     apple pie dick! I agree.
Being skinned alive.

I just don't wanna
     go back to homework.... Sorry.
Thanks for your post, friend!

Also, be prepared
     to go home being very
sore for the first while.

So we meet up once
     or twice a month, have dinner
and drinks and then sex.

I'm going to cut
     out all processed foods except
for bread and noodles.

Because suddenly
     not being fluent is what
*everyone* expects.

[deleted] These are
     clearly not Swedish inmates,
they're Canadian.

First off, I just want
     to say I really enjoyed
reading your answer.

I never met her
     but we discussed her at length
for the next few months.

This is not something
     Apple cares about, supports
or wants to support.

I should consider
     changing it to "Franchisee"
Thanks for the feedback!

What's that? I can't hear
     you over how awesome Star
Trek Online still is.

If he forgives you
     I honestly think you will
have learned your lesson.

Sad. I actually bought
     one a week or two without
my parents knowledge.

If you're not planning
     to educate yourself, that's
your prerogative.

That's where the "extra"
     calories come from. I'm game.
Get it started man!

The most convincing
     confidence is usually
quiet confidence.

I would recommend
     going to J Crew and trying
some of their shorts on.

If you are landing
     solid COM hits and they aren't
doing anything.

"You don't deserve rights
     that I'm privileged to because
I say so." That's wrong.

protracted peoples
     dancing is the only means
to revolution...

So it is unfair
     to compare a group that thinks
with one that doesn't.

Very nicely done
     Irrational Games. Bravo.
Omg, ok.

So over time you
     will see them less dependent
on one another.

I remember trying
     to decide between Huntsman
and Gary Johnson.

Then the time lapse will
     show each team's movement around
the country as well.

If it's just the one
     refugee, you probably don't
have zoning issues.

They can and probably
     will on their own if they know
you're ok with it.

You need proof to know
     that government programs can
redistribute wealth?

It's some work to get
     into the program, but once
you're in it's awesome.

Lauren Cohan *is*
     hot, but I still prefer her
all covered in dirt.

Almost everyone
     I know can open bagged food
packets with their teeth.

I'm supposed to be
     their ideal middle class car
loving customer.

Anytime I pop
     in a game and everything
about it feels... right.

But, I love it when
     other girls can rock that look.
It's sexy and hot.

Or those mesh insert
     dress with the front cleavage dips.
Those are made for you!!!!

Every time I go
     to Disney Start at Bastard,
then Goblin, then Wolf.

Edu was leaning
     back, he clearly got the ball
through the player's legs.

His comment on gay
     people sealed the deal for me.
Get your money back.

This actually happened
     to my league a few years back
when I first started.

This, I suppose, is
     supposed to give some merit
to the whole theory.