Reddit Haikus

Love people that do
     this, too bad I'm always late
for them lol.

Where's the stitch? Is mere
     survival really the life
you want for yourself?

The risk is not worth
     the reward, but it is worth
the experience.

As I said above,
     I really hope it isn't
about this "love" stuff.

I laugh at sandy
     hook jokes [deleted] A Fifth
Element reference!

Which presidential
     candidate wanted to cut
the military?

Keeping anchovies
     in a sealed container next
to your bed may help.

Disclaimer: I will
     no longer call the police
for any reason.

Lines to short. actually,
     that 'magic potion' was just
honey and sawdust!

Discord is really
     great for handling jellies when
you're in starting gear.

I am one of two
     members in my area.
We met once to talk.

Edit: Oh you mean
     the people that went over
seas to kill US troops?

What gives them to right
     to judge me as me opposed
to me judging them?

It gets fun seeing
     peoples drawings and leaving
phone numbers and stuff.

James and Lily would
     have to had really screwed up
to change that aspect.

If you get the chance
     I suggest both of you put
down new roots elsewhere.

One really easy
     way to avoid this happening
is to trim your nails.

I forget.) .....Are you
     hiding behind something while
taking this picture?

If that day does come,
     please vote "no" Menopause will
fix this no problem.

More likely there is
     one repairman for forty
robots, isn't it?

But if your face is
     more or less symmetrical,
why would that matter?

Only on paper.
     In reality these laws
are made for women.

HEY SHEPARD, I MADE
     A MIND BABY EVEN THOUGH
WE AREN'T TOGETHER.

Yeah the ash catcher
     isn't all that great I swapped
mine for a nice bowl.

there are no other
     worth while replies to be made
about this picture.

And you aren't really
     arguing against my point.
Plenty of them went.

I've never seen one
     with the second band like that,
but I'm no expert.

Riot has stated
     that they are indeed against
smurfs [deleted] This!

We were told we would
     be serving a greater good...
Yes, absolutely.

Thanks! I used short, fat
     mason jars, so it wasn't
really an issue.

Your theory actually
     sounds really likely to me.
Those were stairs silly.

I enjoy stealth games,
     I enjoy free running games.
I can't stand AC2.

That's the only back
     talking I'll use for now on.
This made me chuckle.

I imagine you
     could make a pretty decent
milk punch out of it.

There are people though
     who have no morals and use
these ways to get out.

Damn these offensive
     rebounds [deleted] Maybe
this will help you out.

highest kick power
     punter and will witherspoon
for me please. Thank you.

If you need any
     help planning, I'd be more than
happy to assist!

Huh. [deleted] Why
     not let us have our clan tag
on our vehicles?

I have to scoot her
     around the house with me when
I sweep. its GENIUS.

However are you
     sure you're not leading her on?
Does SHE have feelings?

Does it only smell
     after the unit has been
running for awhile?

She might need a back
     brace after a year with those.
You could but you don't?

By the way, if you
     find the cat a new home, you
don't ask for money.

You think we'll ever
     get out of this recession?
I fucking hate this.

Sorry if this sounds
     arrogant, but simply put:
stop being a bitch.

Ignore her in her
     cage for a couple minutes
and then release her.

If you want to post
     anything here I will do
my best to respond.

Just today I was
     reminded that my state's AG
is a total [babe!

What if I don't cash
     the check, but I tear it up?
That's a condition!

you magnificent
     bastard [deleted] I hate
the Addison bus.

If you've lost traction,
     never ever hit the gas,
brakes, or turn sharply.

I'm from a country
     that was founded by a vote
rather than a war.

Read any thread on
     hydration or any thread
on barefoot running.

Getting a speeding
     ticket is absolutely
backed by violence.

You're not SUPPOSED to,
     but fuck the police and do
whatever you want.

*The two small boys stare
     at the former Captain, shocked
by his appearance.

Unfortunately,
     I have no advice other
than affirmation.

Sharing is caring!
     hope you get your legs blown off,
keyboard commando.

However, there's no
     practical difference in what
you do with the site.

Every shooting is
     on the news, if there are three
victims or thirty.

It is probably not
     worth the risk of fighting when
you can run instead.

As a teacher yes
     I can. Come see me after
school engineering.

There is literally
     no scroll bar on that apply
for VET FEE HELP page.

I reported them
     to the counselor on more
than one occasion.

There will always be
     people who resist the ebb
and flow of music.

There is some middle
     ground in there When people drag
their feet when they walk.

Can't wait to hear what
     awaits David Junior next.
Don't over think it!

How did I get on
     9GAG? Can't tell if you called it,
or if you saw it.

who the fuck cares how
     or with what the bowl is packed!
You fucking beat death.

Is that name super
     common or is there a good
chance I know that guy?

Striving for a goal
     and working hard to achieve
keeps things interesting.

Also, I feel you
     on getting most attention
from older women.

They are a far cry
     from the flame power produced
by the sulphur match.

edited to add
     Okay so it did turn out
to be a player.

I dunno... I just
     don't think I have enough time
on my hands... Did he?

Serious question:
     What kind of warranty, if
any comes with this?

at the point the thing
     goes off, they may already
have faced destruction.

Just because he's dead
     doesn't mean we have to talk
nice about him. Right?

Then one time, by pure
     chance, I found out I could fight
and never looked back.

Good luck. I hope you
     have a good time relaxing
in a recliner.

Your goal is to be
     sure you're calm and in control
and protect yourself.

The only person
     who prevents you from seeing
your family is you.

And then the next day,
     I didn't have one. And so on.
It just kinda stopped.

Also, I'm very
     sorry to hear your puppies
health declined so fast.

Even though that is
     somewhat humorous, I feel
sorry for that guy.

These can't tow as much
     as any truck currently
available here.

Rand Paul is VERY
     smart, his calculations seem
to be paying off.

Best of luck to you,
     as there is absolutely
no way to be sure.

I can *totally*
     understand though why women
stay with men like that.

I'm still drinking from
     that game "What do you mean you
forgot the camera?

Now when the bill comes,
     it's divided evenly
between everyone.

Unless you really
     are trying to say that I sit
on a high horse dick.

Especially if it's
     not much of a sacrifice
for a God to "die"?

Or if I had paused
     just a breath before shooting
the first time in toad?

That makes just as much
     sense as saying people who
take drugs are like that.

Many of my friends
     didn't do an internship or
work during college.

[deleted] Also,
     it's infinitely cheaper.
Lighten up Francis.

Lighten up Francis.
     Wait a minute you also
tried the pussy cat?

But there is always
     potential for improvement.
I wish I could help.

And why do you think
     soldiers would have the country's
best interest in mind?

I just haven't worked
     out a satisfactory way
to hold it in place.

I MISS YOU It looks
     like your rotor is hitting
one of those uprights.

The entire school
     year is consumed preparing
for tests basically.

Isn't that what they've
     been doing with the cattle
clones for a while now?

Not many people
     know of anything he did
besides Ring of Fire.

Sadly, this was his
     most successful adventure
in a vehicle.

also, whatever
     your teeth look like, the dentist
has seen FAR, FAR worse.

[deleted] He did
     not pay to just own the game,
he paid to play it.

Thanks for the comments.
     Thanks I'll be glad to check those
places out today.

It's not a US Spec
     540i so they came when the car
came from Germany.

That's why I'm not too
     keen on Canada and those
"hate speech" laws. Indeed.

I mentioned that on
     the other comment this board
if you want to check.

Especially with such
     little information on
the sender online.

Seriously, get
     the fuck out of here, asshole.
Did this work for you?

Find a caloric
     goal that makes sense for your size,
then just stick with that.

I want so badly
     to understand.... but I don't.
This is why I'm broke.

next brew is a mixed
     extract and grain, light summer
ale with orange peel.

hard accounting skills
     are useful, even if you
aren't an accountant.

I feel like she took
     some of my childhood away
and my dad agrees.

"You seem like a great
     person and I'd like to get
to know you better.

[deleted] requires
     fetches to work and doesn't
provide exalted.

But people like you
     can't seem to understand points
that aren't on your script.

Are you aware how
     often we get posts very
similar to yours?

It was an advanced
     class so most of us read or
caught up on class work.

She was a very
     nice girl and had never been
in trouble before.

However, I will
     always semi regret not
going out in style.

Was Ghosts n Goblins
     another classic you had?
That game was brutal.

i'd pet that Waiting
     for this guy to fake arrest
the fake Carl Sagan.

Interesting study.
     Both lawful. You really showed
that vet a lesson.

Thanks for the advice
     So, SO good! I can't even
open doors that well.

I'm going to go
     ahead and call absolute
bullshit on this one.

LOL! What is
     the most valuable item
in your collection?

Best game of the year.
     Don't care what anyone says.
Noticed the same thing.

Pathetically non
     involving missions that feel
extremely tacked on.

First off, I don't know
     why you mention voice acting.
Is that a bad thing?

Kobe's performance
     tonight has made this grown man
cry Do not answer.

I am pissed off but
     at least I didn't pay the current
premium for them.

Super max contract
     extension coming up, you
know he deserves it.

Or pill junkies who
     steal from families whose brother
just drowned in a lake.

Tell them what they need
     to do, and encourage them
to go about it.

[deleted] Do you
     want that card specifically
or just those colors?

There are people who
     train for decades just to be
able to do that.

I've said it every
     time this comes up, but he didn't
aim for the guy's face.

Ideally though, you
     can force Marth to play into
your hand with lasers.

Nukes don't do shit if
     after you fire them, they come
flying back at you.

The most time I've saved
     before going again was
two and a half years.

This saves lives? You mean
     save your own life, and that's just
too selfish for me.

since he had no clue
     what it was he called his friend
who is stationed there.

This was the first thing
     that popped into my head when
I saw the title.

Now I have to send
     out another "hey fiber
is delayed... again.

if you clean the christ
     out of your windows, it will
probably stop happening.

SHE CAN ALSO FUCK
     EVERYONE UP WITH HER EYES
CLOSED! BY ACCIDENT!

Get the internship,
     and ask your supervisor
for extra projects.

Watching my roommate
     dig himself in a drunken
hole with his girlfriend.

But it's always been
     about why all those wrong turns
were not all on him.

"Yo, I sent this guy
     some blue yarn and you'll never
guess what I got back!

Furthermore, will our
     collaborator titles
still be visible?

The best you can do
     is trim down a bit and build
muscle on your legs.

In truth we are all
     just basement dwellers using
our moms credit card.

Feature, not a bug.
     Virtually all "new" aircraft
have severe problems.

It took a few years,
     but I'm happy with how things
turned out. What's your deal?

TO LATE. NOW THERE IS
     ONLY PINKIE PIE! FEAR HER
FOR SHE IS MANY!

Ok, your tuba
     players are definitely
more awesome than ours.

His horse carries him
     everywhere, so it's probably
named Phantom Lancer.

I DEMAND CHAINSAWS!!
     Awesome! Thanks so much! :D You
mean stave off cancer.

And when I do watch
     videos, they're usually
still amateur stuff.

This was my first time
     seeing this and I'm not sure
if its fake or not.

Starbucks in Target.
     And do you mean Breakfast Blend?
I don't see a House.

But if it has dried
     out fire is unlikely. Dude!
Thanks for showing up!

Got very few tips
     and the host of the party
never asked my name.

They think that a war
     with North Korea would just be
wham, bam, thank you ma'am.

I'm only one man
     tho, so don't take this advice
too seriously.

But wow Madison
     Ivy hit me pretty hard.
When I shit gold bricks.

Que? incorrect use,
     not first world problem Alright
sent it in brother!

Sorry mind went else
     where great looking picture though.
Sweet. What do I win?

I've seen other ones
     similar to this and they're
all hilarious.

No homo except
     for Kobe crew checking in.
UM, HELL FUCKING YES.

For the first few months,
     you'll pay rent plus however
much your payments are.

eyes staring at me
     through the window as he cooked
haunts me to this day.

It really just boils
     down to your ability
to affect others.

[deleted] That has
     to be one of the nine worst
things I've ever read.

It took multiple
     attempts of pressing delete
to get them all clear.

That's so great because
     I play the drums! I must be
doing something right.

They probably wouldn't
     kill themselves but we don't know
his situation.

The wise know how much
     hinges on with the right word
at the right moment.

That's my opinion
     though, which doesn't justify
Valve removing it.

They will feel compelled
     to complain then bam you know
security hole.

Last week, I won three
     boosters, and it was my first
draft, so that was fun.

I'd love to see kids
     grow up passing a billboard
like that everyday.

When God interacts
     with man in the OT it is
the Holy spirit.

im right in brighton
     I should not have dropped acid
before clicking that.

[deleted] Grandpa,
     we all worry about you
when you get like this.

Because not all great
     art is difficult to make,
at least not up front.

[deleted] Saw them
     close with this last year at Warped
Tour. Such a fun show.

Stay on the fine line
     between being her REALLY
good friend, and flirting.

Meet them halfway, you
     are willing to work as hard
as they need to work.

Yay Polygamy!
     That's good to know. I wasn't
aware of the fees.

Just the words you used
     to describe him show you're not
much better yourself.

Unfortunately,
     I don't think that I will get
off of it in time.

If you are willing
     to negotiate your price
you can add me up!