Reddit Haikus

Try putting oil on
     your hands to knead, and you'll stick
less and use less flour.

It's something my dad
     does and I guess I must've
picked it up. Wait, what?

Not kidding. I think
     I'd even ask to be put
down if still conscious.

Some sort of contact
     at the very least, within
the next day or two.

I don't care where or
     what position he plays just
get him on the team.

Oscar in **Shark Tale**
     milking the hell out of his
"Shark Slayer" status.

[deleted] I'm not
     racist, but it makes me sad
that some people are.

The great lake will run
     out of water on their own
but that's just stupid.

Some are fairly large
     (enough to comfortably
fit several people).

Also the final
     scene of Braveheart always gets
my man tears flowing.

K M F I would
     recommend that you begin
with the end in mind.

When you send Master
     Chief off of Reach and you reach
the final chapter.

It was fun to try
     different looks and figure out
what worked well for me.

Liquid liner is
     great for a wing and if you
want a precise line.

The only difference
     between the two is the kit
lens that comes with them.

as a contractor,
     I can guarantee I will
show up with my cock.

I may be wrong but
     I'm pretty sure that's why you
don't want to stack batts.

Face it; in Hockey,
     like in pretty much all things,
USA is best.

In the example
     you've provided, that "something"
is an animal.

I was squatting down
     looking at her hamster cage
and it just happened.

When I first said it,
     it was like a fart during
church service... crickets.

but it's really cool!
     Different kind of governments
in different countries.

He plays with Stanley
     Jordan. One of my (pretty
good) friends is at 2k.

*-The killer clearly
     has a lot of connections
in the underworld.

The biggest issue
     I see with your character
is the dex focus.

[deleted] She looks
     like a real version of those
dried Apple grandmas.

[deleted] They went
     into Democracy just
to use the Daycare.

Furnace? Yep. Bed? Yep.
     Storage Boxes? Yep. Camp fire?
Yep. Spread your stuff out.

Forgetting these points
     are almost definitely
why it was removed.

But that call was not
     consistent with what they had
been calling all game.

It's not fun! Good luck!
     I'm still kicking in college,
so you can do it!

I don't think we need
     to take offense at it just
because of that though.

do you have nazis
     in your family? Alright, guys!
All awesome moments!

Anarchy is much
     faster for everything else
and a lot more fun.

Babies... I'm afraid
     I'll drop them or they will get
sick and I'll get blamed.

Thanks for the info.
     Will ask if they've done that when
I do my test drives.

Hofstra seems to be
     more on the affordable
side of tuition.

[deleted] It is
     still illegal to open
someone elses mail.

My little suburb
     doesn't get 4G but nearby
Sacramento does.

Sure, this guy can dress
     in all white and hide his face
and people love him.

But wait, I can see
     blue things just as well as green
or red things! you say.

It really just looks
     like you had a bad nights sleep,
not too bad at all.

Not a drug dealer
     sneaking in an OZ of kush.
Buckshot Jones as well!

"-Peter Jason Quill
     Honestly, I think it should
have been discussed first.

..but not Russia's :D
     I'm almost positive that's
WHY she's worrying.

I think she's going
     to do pretty well. I tried...
I can't brain right now!

Every day I was
     sad and I would tell myself
that it wasn't right.

after I told him
     I was pregnant. We hadn't
been together long.

They covered parts, paint,
     and labour when they replaced
my hatch due to rust.

It's a gift. I think
     the problem is that if it's
always one sided.

He passes to you
     and at the end of the turn
you SR for x=5.

They're less social. But,
     everyone I know has loved
everywhere they've lived.

It's well established
     that people don't pay any
attention to signs.

Did the teams put on
     the wrong uniforms today?
"What did you wish for?"

I wouldn't expect
     aliens to understand
our art very well.

Chances that I will
     find a fix is really slim
I think that's crazy.

Since she gave you her
     number most likely she likes
you, so just be you.

I'm happy about
     all the up votes, but fuck me,
people are brutal.

A late night talk show
     isn't going to be worth
dick down the road, though.

don't let these people
     scare you into not doing
what you want to do.

And the women's camp
     she held in Collingwood was
the first of its kind.

I'd consider them
     opposites as measured from
the 'democrat' pole.

[deleted] Sorry
     to bother but where did you
learn calligraphy?

I've been debating
     whether or not I should take
my mom on a trip.

I feel like Goldie
     will start crying the next time
he mentions Rashad.

Wouldn't make much sense
     Yeah, well... I bet he did not
wash behind his ears!

We still haven't walked
     in the glow of each other's
majestic presence.

Sewing life fibers
     into your baby isn't
already abuse?

Canadian here,
     visited the Keys during
the end of July.

just because there are
     many people doing it,
it makes it right. yup.

I used to go down
     there about once a month when
I lived in memphis.

Because depression
     is much easier to treat
than obesity.

Another one is
     sapling But I thought we weren't
tanking anymore.

EDIT: If you want
     something to zone out to, look
up *Lassie Come Home*.

I do think it was
     made with lighting, REAL LIGHTNING!
"After it comes true?"

The Drag is the most
     desired destination
outside of downtown?

[deleted] If you're
     not anti cop, then you aren't
paying attention.

I feel if you are
     not part of the solution
you are the problem.

Yet I don't see men
     scheming and plotting behind
another man's back.

The first two may be
     true, but I am quite certain
that the third is not.

In the other build
     power and all commercial
or industrial.

It all depends what
     you mean buy a "complex" web
app your "dream web app".

My Grandfather was
     born in the states, but he was
full blooded Irish.

[deleted] this seems
     to happen a lot I don't
think it does that much.

I'll probably end up
     picking it up sometime soon.
Thanks for your input!

It would be like trying
     to breathe with a gorilla
standing on your chest.

It got pretty much
     everything out on my car
and my girlfriends car.

All turtle beaches
     break in less then a few months
Well, Im on console.

well, the same type thing
     has happened to my family.
He sounds like a jerk.

Uh, I probably would
     understand that better than
regular flirting.

I guess it's just me
     worrying because it's frowned
upon/ illegal.

If you ever play
     the 2K games, watch out for him
on the Wizards' bench.

It really looks like
     you're not wearing a damn thing,
but still look polished.

You may love him, but
     he does not love you enough
to commit to you.

if you don't mind me
     asking, which program are you
apart of? Oh yes!

The paychecks didn't though.
     A guy my dad knew had his
truck stolen years back.

So maybe extend
     the benefit of the doubt
until tomorrow?

A rhetorical
     question, for I know it's her.
It has to be her.

"I will have you back.
     You are mine. You always were
and always will be.

Sounds like an Idle
     Air control problem if there's
no check engine light.

Who knows, I wasn't
     able to access their site
earlier today.

Especially when you
     know you commented something
stupid earlier.

[deleted] Boo... Boo,
     I say! Thank you! I really
appreciate that!

They don't care about
     your problems unless you are
paying them to care.

Plus it's fun to see
     what races others have done
by seeing their shirts.

The only true way
     to find a pieces name is
to name it while high.

Once I got closer
     he turned around with butter
dripping from his chin.

They're fucking drag queens!
     Words are gonna be said, shade
is gonna be thrown.

Honestly, they are
     hilarious and way too
smart for their own good.

I personally like
     the ongoing meta war
between the two sides.

How many rounds do
     you lose because you don't know
where your teammate died?

I was never on
     when it was seen, all I know
is that it's evil.

Next up on the rung,
     is the countries that really
figurehead this war.

"I'm done" lol
     It doesn't even look like
there's water in it!

Because we choose not
     to expose it to ourselves
(exposure bias).

You just don't know why
     she goes after the douche when
you're such a nice guy.

Some hardly have much
     money after paying their
bills, in work or not.

"Why? Who knows?" It would
     be nice if that sort of thing
would last, but it won't.

Though time spent without
     problems is time spent without
solving them. Add me!

Tis GLORIOUS Yes,
     I meant them. You didn't answer
my other question.

Bill Burr or Bruce Bruce
     would never do an act like
Izzard. Good for you!

Obviously you
     don't trust this guy, and he's not
worthy of your trust.

I already do
     know about the species you
are referring to.

I'll add you right now
     Let's go! I figured, we were
the only ones close.

Hurrah!" My girlfriend
     is visiting her parents
and old college friends.

People are in their
     own little bubbles, grinding
away to the top.

You can't tell me you
     don't know you are already
extremely pretty?

On tablet don't feel
     like explaining my question
again, I guess Sat.

She has normal strength.
     Pussy licking horse Did you
just go ass to mouth?

He's a second year
     player of course he struggles
with consistency.

Still don't talk. I guess
     we're over without even
acknowledging it.

That sounds delicious!
     Ahh right, forgot about those
alternate designs.

In a pinch you will
     be without lights or be trapped
somewhere while they charge.

Don't teams normally use
     one when you get down that big
that early? thank you!

That's the entire
     point of capitalism
and a free market.

A word of advice;
     "basic pre sex bullshit" is
very important.

What you gonna do?
     What you gonna do, make our
dreams come true! you too.

Wait until I'm right
     in front of you before you
do that. Not really.

How about something
     like a reverse Diana
E? Blade of the Moon?

"I want you to walk
     over there in your highest
heels and walk on them.

It was so much fun!
     Playing with a kid just adds
so much to the game.

Oh, who could have guessed?
     Wouldn't you just love it if
he was dark haired too?

It must be so much
     fun Loving the "Plunge into
History" book on top.

Drifting is for style,
     and probably the slowest way
to take a corner.

Though, not being good
     at a hobby doesn't mean
you should give it up.

I like the art style!!
     IT GOT A LITTLE SKETCHY
FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

I'm always afraid
     someone will try to switch lanes
while I'm passing them.

And honestly, it's
     not like Democracy is
perfect anyway.

This is so far off
     base, that it's not even worth
arguing against.

but its not only
     at this instance, they have done
many other times.

I just search Nearby
     "yarn store" and it's amazing
what it will turn up.

However, he was
     interesting and made the class
more enjoyable.

I'm in Mar Vista,
     which is right between Culver
City and Venice.

For trade posts, [H] must
     start the title (come before
[W]). **Scammers.

[deleted] Only
     Toronto can. Windsor cant
and other cities.

No. Give you a nice
     cut that causes you to bleed
on your rig? Probably.

Although I can read
     music, which makes it a bit
easier for me.

I gave you credit
     in my original post.
Sorry about that.

I'm taking about
     something a lot more general
here and you know that.

I'm would recommend
     watching Turn A and 08th
MS Team before SEED.

See if you like it.
     No? Cool, delete it or try
some other colors.

Even if you put
     creamer in coffee, you're still
drinking real coffee.

We always end up
     smoking all of them before
the trip is over.

Do not ask me why.
     I had some sweet lesbian
porn on my laptop.

You'll never post here
     again once you get fed up
with the argument.

Good thing the target
     by me has a ton of their
makeup on clearance.

This is how Lewis
     Black makes a living. Your wish
is my command... Cool.

Probably. It isn't
     something that bothers me, just
something I noticed.

It can be pretty
     complicated when dealing
this situation.

The phone guy is here!
     Now I am not clear; What, did
his vehicle stall?

Now I am not clear;
     What, did his vehicle stall?
The phone guy is here!

He is so pretty!
     His makeup looks better than
I can make mine look!

He can fly at light
     speed or faster, and can fly
through time, literally.

What do you think will
     happen to the other fish
and plants in the tank?

This is assuming
     that a big group of people
are doing the FATE.

[deleted] Go read
     the user review on that,
it's hilarious.

If you really cant
     decide, ask a person who's
opinion you trust.

I bet you actually
     are scared of random people
on the Internet.

[deleted] I've been
     wanting to swatch my stash on
sticks for a while now!

Did it ever work
     for, or did it do this since
you got it? Same here.

Funny randomly
     seeing someone else on here
who has been through that.

I came here to work
     for the university,
so it was worth it.

Is not believing
     in a god an assertion?
Hello and welcome!

A word that has been
     *adopted* (did you not see
that comment of mine?

I'm sure it won't be
     as important to you when
you find out you're wrong.

It definitely
     shows (that you've been painting all
your life, not the breaks).

Yes! I hate that noise.
     Especially when it's foamy
like soda or beer.

But, for the lazy,
     I have included some links
to similar ones.

We also have some
     exits that only exist
in one direction.

He was already
     excited with the leash on.
Once his leash was off.

Can confirm. TIL cops
     are too lazy to do their
job [deleted] [I!

After my parents
     called the police, the neighbor
treated us like shit.

I did criminal
     defense out of San Jose
and San Francisco.

This sounds like something
     I've been waiting for an old
flame to say to me...

Because I want you
     to urinate on my face
while I masturbate.

The enemies can
     pick them up too, however.
Thanks for the feedback!

Being constantly
     bullied in your own home is
not acceptable.

He broke your door twice
     so now they don't want to buy
you another door?

They should kick him out
     if he won't stop breaking stuff
and causing problems.

I feel like it's trying
     to fill that gap, but doesn't
have the same story.

F weather. I punched
     the dashboard because I thought
the gas gauge got stuck.