Reddit Haikus

Please don't give advice
     like this unless you know what
you're talking about.

You're just a cheap jerk.
     What do you mean "acting like
whores" if I dare ask?

I don't like my sex
     acts to have diminutive
names, but that's just me.

So many buttons!
     You have to do it when you
first start a prison.

No tablet will be
     worth a damn for note taking
without a keyboard.

Sending the email
     I wrote without a number
would have been stupid.

Your opinion man,
     I know plenty of people
who think otherwise.

Say what now? Do you
     have any experience
with Gypsies at all?

I could end his life
     and he couldn't do a thing
to stop me. Nothing.

Bullshit. There's no US
     state where 'marijuana is
completely legal".

He's not applying
     anywhere near enough force
to have that effect.

I'm from Quito, you
     make Ecuador proud! Thank you.
Hola Sebastian!

Look at all the states
     legalizing cannabis.
That's not changing things?

But also those from
     back in the day that don't get
credit nowadays.

And can you still do
     the "sweeps" (Holding down Poke check
and sweeping the ice)?

You're right. It doesn't
     explicitly determine
my implication.

I know it may not
     be much to some of you, but
you guys are awesome.

That long grey part towards
     the end was awful, always
running out of fuel.

Fusion research is
     what brought those two together
in my opinion.

Well I'm not a girl,
     but it's nice to save money
on this sort of stuff.

Please find this person.
     Even if just to see if
the love is still there.

He's not. Why are you
     assuming OP is a calm,
reasonable person?

at least in my school,
     they'll be the type to be nice
and let you sit there.

i had never been
     in suspended before, or
anything like that.

*Please* educate me
     about what I am lacking
in understanding.

The money doesn't
     belong to you because you
didn't have the coupon.

As far as you know
     and are able to know, you
spent twenty dollars.

Might want to get on
     that before they are required
at every checkpoint....

Think i can still get
     the butane out with low heat
or a vacuum purge?

I hope you enjoy
     the entire run if you
end up reading it.

Those kids were clearly
     not mature enough to make
their own decisions.

You can be fat or
     you can be a bitch, but you
can't be a fat bitch.

Will going open
     source be the best thing that could
happen to this game?

Even today, if
     you had a case of smallpox
we couldn't cure it.

I only have one
     rhizome that is a little
smaller than my hand.

Only just now did
     I realize that is a man
and not a woman.

And there's film music,
     and video game music,
which is just awesome!

That doesn't mean you
     deliberately go looking
for catastrophes.

Everyone except
     Helen and Amanda should
just walk out the door.

Where we learn from those
     who came before and worship
their wonderful ways.

You're forgetting all
     the verses that talk about
belief in Allah.

Buy some real drugs, kid.
     What's the most incredibly
stupid your parents.

Forever. No one
     else needs to worry about
the potential child.

[deleted] Same can
     be said of all politics,
at every level.

I just taught her how
     to do every question wrong.
She failed the final.

She failed the final.
     Bitch. You're cute! It was too long,
so I didn't read it.

Another problem
     was how the movie just wrapped
up in a second.

They didn't treat it like
     that and that it why people
were disappointed.

I desperately hope
     you're not using silicon
with sensitive skin.

These games were all more
     serious art style than WoW
and they still look fine.

Lizards are not meant
     to have ropes around their necks.
...did it work? Oh crap.

Leave that man alone,
     who are you to tell someone
how to be a fan.

Could be a good wake
     up call, we aren't shit yet, you
gotta play em' boys.

You're driving me from
     A to B and I haven't
even talked to you.

All I can say is
     I wish you the best of luck
with this pregnancy!

The capitalist
     countries are fucking it up
in another way.

Beijing and Shanghai:
     harmony tier Rest are shit
tier No it's just you.

Would be the perfect
     place to launch missions to more
distant locations.

But Religion is
     part of humanity just
as much as sex is.

Only God Forgives.
     I was really excited
because I loved Drive.

Actually they shouldn't
     because I don't want to cry
in front of my friends.

That is probably why
     the Navy fire truck showed up.
Proximity. Specs?

imo the tupac
     v biggie was neither, but
biggie is better.

Wow, this seems perfect.
     Thanks a lot! We're not racist,
we only hate cats.

I would get away
     as soon as possible if
you are able to!

What if she does change,
     doesn't inform you, and then
applies for a job?

So I just sat down
     and started looking over
my answers again.

I just don't see why
     I need to spend my paid time
dealing with their kids.

Oh. No. You should see
     what they say to the actual
girls once they find them.

My mom makes a soy
     sauce based marinade so it's
not that strange to me.

Once it is applied,
     it is assumed to be used
by the customer.

The coupon he used
     was not for his own pizza,
but the customer.

Trying to think how how
     to do the one thing that you
just failed at. Hello.

I firmly believe
     that interesting dreams come from
interesting people!

[deleted] How did
     he manage to tackle two
people at one time?

I live a block from
     downtown and love this gem on
the peninsula!

I heard this then checked.
     He clearly blinks several times
in the movie. Yay!

Thought everything was
     enabled, but if they missed
something let them know.

Lol I was
     just about to teach my mom
how to play halo.

I thought Gearbox might
     have programmed it that way on
purpose, or something.

it is NOT just some
     scam, or a waste of time, like
you seem to believe.

Oh man, I wonder
     what the other arguments
were like in that case.

He's not making you
     do this, that makes zero sense.
Do the right thing, please.

It's comfortable
     for the same reasons tank tops
are comfortable.

Fuck that shit. I'd be
     pissed as fuck if I was him.
Burn them at the stakes!

Why is it so hard
     or threatening to start this now
and build off of it?

I don't understand
     why people keep trying to make
these giant servers.

My Diva Cup was
     one of the best purchases
I have ever made.

Last concert I went
     to I met a woman who
has kids in college.

[deleted] That stop
     code usually indicates
some hardware issue.

Either the spider
     would get smashed or the human
would burn down his house.

[deleted] Those two
     words should never, ever be
in the same sentence.

I have the strangest
     conversations with myself
in my head sometimes.

Should tell you it felt
     awesome and supremely
disgusting as well!.

I go to my mum
     in the yard and ask her how
to spell "I signed it".

What presents do you
     buy people? Chosen career?
Where you socialize?

Gonna have to stop
     working for the government
before I do that.

Because we don't like
     people who fabricate their
mental illnesses.

Simply asserting
     otherwise doesn't' do much
for your argument.

Some of the crowd takes
     the hint and runs for cover,
others stand in shock.

Maybe the wife will
     watch with me. In the day time...
That's so cool. I want.

[deleted] True, but
     that won't get you back from eve.
No, much like your brain.

The amount of shame
     lying on your back now must
be incredible.

Can't stand the music.
     There's other places where you
can go to meet girls.

Remember that there
     are two cultures in Iraq:
Sunni and Shia.

[deleted] That's not
     universal, even though
I've heard it before.

When i say "every
     once in awhile" I don't mean
every other game.

Seriously, when
     are they going to bring back
hoedown already?

[deleted] Joe seemed
     really uncomfortable
during the whole thing.

As in "Don't got one
     leg" [deleted] Two mushrooms
walk into a bar.

I heard this #blackout
     was an advertising plan
to get more business.

CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP
     Is the belt completely gone
or broken in half?

Yeah sometimes it's hard
     to realize that it really
doesn't hurt to ask.

That might have something
     to do with it. They both do.
It's probably lighting.

If you go for them
     I hope it works out for you!
Yeah, but he didn't score.

Or do her healing
     abilities not work like
that and I'm stupid?

Sorry, not losing
     my shitty source of income
over a fraud trend.

Crazy thought. Have you
     checked with the landlord about
putting a door in?

Someone took a shit
     on a George Foreman grill &
cooked it up a bit?

Damn. You don't see true
     innovation often, but
when you do... Just, damn.

Had a companion
     that had his 28th birthday
while I was with him.

I hope that makes sense.
     In every failure, we should
find some lesson, right?

Which blend is this one?
     It just felt better to talk
about it I guess.

I wanna see some
     really open places like
some plains, or tundra.

i know dat feel bro..
     I wouldn't mind getting Pence
for a decent price.

I do not think games
     will average triple in size
on the new console.

I'd love to be see
     how video games can play
into the whole thing.

Like giving up first
     blood is considered a throw
to most people now.

But the short answer
     is, there is no one answer.
He wants what he wants.

It's been a fairly
     consistent operation
since it's inception.

Am I the only
     one around here who doesn't
know what SO means? thanks!

Simple as that You
     are not in the ghetto if
there are Bodegas.

That is huge almost
     my entire waist. sounds good!
i'm on my way then.

It should help, a ton.
     I didn't feel anything when
I did it that way.

An open beta
     is where anybody can
sign up and get in.

Well, if it makes you
     feel better, odds are he won't
play as long as Brett.

This seems to be what
     you're asking for, a modem
without a router.

Seemed like a moody
     bitch getting emotional
and losing her cool.

I was coming on
     here to post about this scene
from this episode.

Yeah, I really like
     that move it's what I wanted
from the beginning.

Fuck my shitty name
     remembering skills I was glad
to learn about him.

This is a common
     problem with no real answer,
in my opinion.

We definitely
     look at forecasts and take them
with a grain of salt.

They specifically
     draw attention to the ass,
thigh, and crotch regions.

Though him calling you
     "crazy" and "ridiculous"
throws up a red flag.

Ever. Even if
     I was withering away
or in extreme pain.

Don't stop making these,
     I was so sad when I saw
there were only two.

Love those colors!!! Beans.
     Those stringy, awful texture,
devil fruit should die!

How long have these plants
     been in your tank, and how long
have they looked like this?

I believe you are
     referring to A Clockwork
Orange. No prob man.

The first few pictures
     have a very Mass Effect
feel to them. Agreed.

when does the stream start,
     my brother is freaking out
and we cant find it.

Not so much about
     the sports than middle school girls
goofing off, really.

She always greets me
     at the door when I return
though, no matter what.

Plenty of people
     went from where you are starting
to doing just fine.

Yes they have condoms.
     They are in SR. You don't
have to request them.

Whenever she walked
     by me and my friends would say
"Heil Adolf Sanchez!"

Which, ultimately,
     is the way of all highly
nationalist peoples.

My toaster. My bread
     is either burnt to hell or
still partially frozen.

My favorite show! Thanks!
     From their perspective, it's not
so bad honestly.

But that's it, I won't
     push you off or anything
cause you're pretty cool.

Any medical
     institution worth their salt
already knows this.

He's not working there
     anymore, but I don't think
that was the reason.

I will blow by all
     my sport bike riding friends on
redwood any day.

short shorts look good on
     young girls. that's why they wear them.
you fucking moron.

THAT LOLLIPOP LOOKS
     DELICIOUS We Cant Stop is
so catchy... Pay up.

In this case, I don't
     believe the actions warrant
the death penalty.

I don't suggest you
     messing with them unless you
know what you're doing.

But any way you
     draw it up, that's a mighty
fine looking lineup!

This isn't "so much
     money" for how much time they've
put into the sport.

You can't spend it or
     put it in the bank, yet some
people live for it.

Accept that sometimes
     people are not interested;
it's not personal.

I also mentioned
     here that I would likely sub
out my living room.

Thank you, I really
     appreciate the step by
step explanation.

They went by Series,
     Publishers, Developer
packs, etc.

Uhh... Oh yeah, it was
     paired with lots of confused "I'm
very sorry!" waves.

Yes, yes, great question.
     I love this story, I will
never forget it.

I'd certainly be
     willing to answer any
questions you might have.

It also gives you
     something shorter to count down
too then your visits!

They are normal, there
     is nothing wrong with you or
your relationship!

Unfortunately,
     there's nothing in the picture
to size it against.

And when you deny
     that you just make the hurt hurt
all over again.

*shudder* Surely you
     Jest... So being a little
odd makes me a dick?

Rex can get the D
     to bounce back and our running
game should be better.

It's terrifying
     waiting to find out if its
spread etc.

Most fun job ever,
     even though I felt sleazy
the entire time.

One of the best bands
     out today and letters home
just adds to that claim.

That's why I've written
     up a transition bin "how
too" for new owners.

If it's internet
     or video games or sex
or booze, it all kills.

The first official
     number release post consoles
will be glorious!

Like, clearly a bright,
     motivated guy who was
good at selling stuff.

Almost killed myself
     two years ago, literally
got talked off the ledge.

Well that was pointless
     Thank the fucking lord I am
not the only one.

He was pricey, but
     that also depends on how
big your budget is.

What a bright spot he's
     been since that cold opening
month or two. Oooh, neat!

Seriously, what
     kind of a point does that make
to our governance?

As a Heat hater,
     I wanted him anywhere
else but Miami.

I'm sure believing
     this makes life simpler for you
but it is just wrong.

That's something *I* drew,
     except I did it by hand,
and it was colored.

Both events happened
     ONE MONTH AGO. I'm fucking
terrified right now.

That's the thing. You can
     believe that all you want, but
that's not what happened.