Reddit Haikus

b. Vulgar An act
     or instance of sexual
touching or fondling.

You think Pittsburgh should
     have won before they earned it.
Clearly you were wrong.

Sounds dumb, ends up cute,
     and you learn a new hobby
or two in each book.

It sounds like it'll be
     pretty simple, but very
fun and rewarding.

All that being said,
     I don't think I would ever
live here with a kid.

Sometimes road grime sticks
     to the stuff and customers
think they have a leak.

[deleted] So, does
     this mean I find Nintendo
to be cute as hell?

Bill Fucking Always
     Murray. Ha! I actually live
right near lemmon drive.

The 360's graphics are
     very dated, but they're still
making games for it.

There should be a lot
     more to this than 'ladies be
careful out there'. Christ.

He's not saying what
     you have to like, only what
you have to observe.

I'm afraid people
     will probably want a picture
to know what you mean.

[deleted] When did
     Obama pull a Michael
Jackson and turn white?

Is it even well
     known today that he was killed
because of this, no.

I actually made it,
     so it's a relief to hear
that it's accurate.

I understand some
     games restrict party chat but
not all of them do.

He charges so much
     because he uses the most
expensive products.

I corrected her:
     "No. The lamb is a baby
version of a sheep.

Transition points goes
     to next area, monster
sits in it roaring.

I am guessing not
     from someone you should have been
buying money from.

Their litter boxes
     are better smelling that cats,
just keep up with it.

We should stop paying
     our taxes in an effort
to gain attention.

All he gave me was
     surgical soap and told me
to get some wound wash.

[deleted] Not sure
     if serious about them
being valuable.

I get it, you think
     everything is force so you
can justify force.

I'm sure we can all
     come to some sort of peaceful
conclusion to this.

The same cannot be
     said for waking up one day
without a foreskin.

My favorite band is
     The Airborne Toxic Event.
What are you into?

It's better to go
     into a game excited
rather than anxious.

It's not like there's much
     I can do and it's also
not like I'm not trying.

Car makers, fed up
     with the onslaught of kitten
deaths, have begun to.

So you would agree
     the person I'm responding
to is incorrect.

Also, a menstrual
     cup can be used multiple
times and lasts for years!

But they do know good
     tips as they are often like
personal trainers.

Also own that set.
     I agree. Everyone likes
to bash others taste.

[deleted] Ya see,
     this is where ya need to start
putting your foot down.

I absolutely
     despise women expecting
men to pay for them.

Not being able
     to find them in the morning
because I cant see.

Personally I mute
     the tv during the prayer
and go get a beer.

I found donating
     to be the most effective
way of raising it.

Where's the right come from?
     I like the "no nations, no
borders" idea.

agree Unless you're
     going for extreme clocks, you'll
be fine with air cooled.

[deleted] Well then
     what am I going to do
with all this ice cream?!

Hell, it could be worse
     than ever now that it's been
abandoned for years.

Hopefully someone
     else might have some more informed
opinions on this.

Leaving now to buy
     some new Puma racing shoes
and some driving gloves.

"2(7x3)" Spoiler tag bro.
     Some people here haven't seen
or know about it.

You can still see dents
     in the earth from the wagons
and find arrow heads.

Navigators don't
     gain the power to fold space
from ingesting spice.

You don't need new ones,
     just be smarter with the ones
you already have.

for a little more,
     you can get a much better,
cleaner looking shoe.

Ah, so rather than,
     "How are you feeling?" or "What
do you think of [X]?

He kept asking me
     how I kept it from falling
out when I stood up.

The parentheses
     imply inversion, and must
include a chord tone.

Move along PC
     gamers, even though they are
losing their freedom.

Until then lets hold
     the current guys responsible.
Best Wishes for you!

Not even BRIAN
     BLESSED can fix what is broken
from its inception.

Improving national
     health and saving lives often
makes people richer.

If this story is
     true, your boss should have never
asked you to do that.

Sorry for the rant,
     but these are all signs that you
need a new agent.

You can also just
     do some searching on your own
and go look yourself.

I'd be more happy
     with Shaw, either Van Gundy,
or Sloan than with Karl.

I slept in that chair
     for a few hours and then walked
home (apparently).

Marshal: "Well we're not
     going to take the stairs or
the elevator.

Alright i saw it.
     It's not really worth shipping
out to me. Sorry!

Spit. Seriously.
     Something about a protein
in your saliva.

If it's just a few
     casual dates in every month
then I wouldn't care.

I was POPULAR.
     Party every so often.
Go and chat a bit.

I'll do everything
     to defend your right to keep
things private. I don't.

I'd love to have this.
     Oh, my. edit: sorry, just
read the bellow post.

Plenty of places
     to find pictures, I come here
for the discussions.

Neither earth snakes nor
     worm snakes are found anywhere
near California.

Travolta was great
     in that film My god that was
worded horribly.

The park is crowded.
     The only solution is
to be there early.

And not all street art
     is done with ill intent, or
to vandalize, folks!

I guess I would ask
     you to explain what you mean
here a bit better.

Except that would be
     forcing their will on others,
which is the problem.

whole thing seems pretty
     hilarious to me Most
screens are moving screens.

I hope it's nothing
     like the concert announcements.
I want something good.

He listed more than
     one possible way for him
to be disappeared.

And with it being
     "kitten season" our rescue
is filling up fast!

I do not support
     or condone violent action.
I guess that makes sense.

The dog was all like
     "Quit smoking!" And he was all
like "You're not my mom!

If you are gonna
     vote for someone, you should know
what that someone is.

It really made me
     feel good and I've been golfing
with them ever since.

[deleted] Mommy
     doesn't give him attention.
Please love this poor kid.

It doesn't translate
     well even if you're going
on a monologue.

More specifically,
     to say we would do nothing
is ridiculous.

What to talk about?
     Hell, this was my friend, and what
could we talk about?

The woman that won
     the Nobel Prize in Science.
Not Madame Curie.

we'll get a working
     death star before that happens.
Think of it this way.

Being a Heat fan
     is "cool", being a heat douche
is even better..

Replying to come
     back to this later to see
if the pictures come.

Last vinyl I bought,
     I loved it since the first time
I saw the artwork.

Do whatever you
     can to stick up for yourself
and still remain safe.

[deleted] Probably
     Jason, I was a bit gay
for the red ranger.

There are logs you can
     print online or make your own
for people to sign.

A guy noticed rain
     on a map that has been out
for nearly two years.

OH MY GOD! I had
     heard rumors, BUT THE WOLF'S HEAD
WAS ON HIS SHOULDERS!!!!

It can be hard though
     because he has changed so much
since we were married.

gimme a dollar
     figure here It's like Christmas
morning for Joffrey.

With a determined
     abuser it will happen
again and again.

People say they are
     leaving but they will be back.
They always come back.

Spacing would be shit.
     They like having the corner
shooters in for that.

Thanks for that. I feel
     like Sid can be a little
too quiet at times.

It's okay for him
     to say that because his best
friend is a fraction.

Like, more than before.
     He hit the climax. Not off
the top of my head.

Then they can get back
     to Chandler being 6th
man, etc.

I see beavis on
     the left, butthead on the right
...vote Independent.

So, we as humans
     are harder, better, faster,
stronger, after all?

Am I the only
     one who finds this just dripping
in sweet irony?

You think someone would
     just go and make up something
on the internet?

It looks.. trashy Cool.
     I just showered in power!
Then pissed on power!

It's not like you can
     get old conversations you
had with your deceased.

It sounds awesome, though.
     Anyone have any thoughts?
So just and update.

Does it look good? Yeah.
     Is it full of features? Yes.
Is it safe? You bet!

The carts were in great
     condition because they weren't
out in the weather.

I think Taking Lives
     gets too much hate. That ending!
Shit. THAT'S what it's for?

It starting to sound
     like a rather crackpot world
we're describing here.

Makes Canadians
     Hardy [deleted] Ever
been to Tijuana?

That is a good start.
     Absolutely: most books are
much too expensive.

One just needs to look
     at the writings from the time,
the correspondence.

You mustn't go there!
     You will see things no one was
ever meant to see.

I would also be
     sick if I learned my sister
were that unstable.

I know this post is
     from a while back, but I just
came across it now.

Had no idea
     who he was at the time, but
glad I checked him out.

Thanks If they're going
     all out designing this, why
not flip the action?

Not really keen on
     guns myself, but the mental
image is funny.

That's my view on life.
     Except when it comes to rape
and murder 'n shit.

Do Muslims believe
     He was the Messiah or
just a great prophet?

Most I ever did
     was a minute and twenty
and I felt like death.

In my opinion,
     the coolest one is the third
from bottom to top.

The hundred other
     comments are all just baiting
out your confession.

Does anyone know
     who the Sprint halftime report
is brought to us by?

Maybe they should've
     done those no turnover drills
he said they don't do.

I'm not really sure
     if you could substitute rum
for espresso though.

also if you eat
     just corn for a few days, will
your poop just be grains?

My favorite lesson
     was when i would learn about
my savior, jesus.

Should every person
     who sees you that day also
give you that amount?

The phone was clearly
     visible and in a high
traffic area.

I'd like you to make
     out with my girlfriend, I hope
that only sounds weird.

i'd imagine things
     have settled down a lot since.
That is amazing.

Quitting the job meant
     that I could finally work
for myself full time!

I hope that many
     more adventures and friends find
you in the future!

Get out to Wrigley
     Field sometime and really get
that experience.

Please tell me you are
     lying There are several good
female characters.

Feminists are not
     all women, and women are
not all feminists.

I would also like
     to point out, sadly, that Chris
Davis has cooled off.

Our military
     is also sworn to uphold
the constitution.

For masters, research
     experience and letters
aren't as important.

*Cyrus was engulfed
     in black flames, all that remained
was a pile of ash.

That was a huge thing
     that hooked me on my (now) wife.
Don't be a ninny.

I always threaten
     my friends that if they cut them
selves, i will cut them.

I'll trade you the Knight
     for your Archer since you can
use the Knight next turn.

Also nice to see
     technical troubles plague more
than just me sometimes!

If you'll look around,
     you can see we've already
made that decision.

I like this poem
     but I'm having a hard time
deciphering it.

*right I don't think I'd
     ever trust a tattoo shop
called "Screaming Needle".

Maybe she has kids
     and had other stuff to deal
with in the morning.

You shouldn't use them.
     BUT. Putting someone in jail
also causes harm.

Typically a shirt
     will make it on to different
sites within a month.

This was the first time
     I ever saw such a large
multiplayer game.

They're heroes to bring
     this information forward,
as it ought to be.

I would actually not
     converse with someone who spoke
that way face to face.

But that was my fault
     for not doing some better
research into it.

They always have good
     Morale though. If i could go
back i would still join.

Oh my God I can't
     stop laughing at your response.
Batman. I'm a girl.

Just remember do
     what works for you and makes you
feel comfortable.

Maybe the comment
     was meant to insult Dawkins,
but so the fuck what?

Perhaps we all don't
     get miracles because there
are no miracles.

Just wait till they start
     "releasing" details about
his personal life.

Tone it down a notch.
     yep, looks like a car to me
I love animals!

God forbid you go
     down, the leather will hold up.
I don't believe you.

If you make a fist
     and punch someone in the face,
it would be assault.

He violated
     his agreement to protect
sensitive data.

Tops are great as green
     onions when young and the bulb
can also be used.

This stuff truly seems
     stranger than fiction to me
and I don't know why.

"Well... Ok." Next day:
     "Don't mind the cum stains." Three words:
Death Star colossal.

And as long as you're
     not obese, you really can't
be all that ugly.

It's like men are some
     alien from another
world that just arrived.

Congratulations.
     This was an unusually
predictable year.

The entire thing
     kind of grew on me after
multiple listens.

As long as you can
     follow direction i'm sure
you'd be welcome in.

But for regular
     coffee, a consistent grind
size is preferable.

They usually don't
     know until someone tells them
or they take a test.

In The Leisure Hive,
     we see him get fried because
he touches water.

So why is it hard
     for a straight forward answer
with a yes or no?

Some couples are just
     ok with pushing boundaries
further than others.

and it's a stone's throw
     from chinatown, also filled
with delicious eats.

You're obviously
     not even educated.
That is quite the range.

He was actively
     taunting the opposing team
and made one kid cry.

Damn, Roose and Walder
     Frey are such deliciously
slimy characters.

Opening your mouth
     to criticize is a sign
you may be a prick.

[deleted] I find
     the 11th doctor to be
too spontaneous.

How so much hair comes
     from such a small animal
I don't even know.

I thought Reese ending
     up having some weird blood lust
and they made him quit?

so good. Exactly!
     [deleted] It very well
might have been Pippen.

It seriously
     scarred me as a kid, good on
ya for doing that.

If you meant for her
     to feel bad about her job,
then you suck for it.

People always flock
     towards the guy who looks like he's
having the most fun!

And it's not as if
     everything I say is wrong
(or interrupting).