Reddit Haikus

I'm gonna assume
     sales were a little worse due
to the rain today.

I also didn't used
     to drive all that much before
I had my daughter.

I don't remember
     which email i used, or if
i used one at all.

I get a stuffy
     nose when I drink rock and rye
and certain vodkas.

Yeah I see, still done
     appreciate the lazy
storytelling though.

If I had to go
     to a bowl, the extra time
just wouldn't feel right.

The perfect man has
     no penis and a nice rack
so basically me.

I'll be looking out
     for a woman like you next
time I'm on the train.

the eyebrows at least
     It was used a lot last year
during the playoffs.

He gave up the house
     so he wouldn't have to raise
my sisters and I.

Would we be able
     to store them in the locker
after we get them?

No. At least for me.
     Equality of outcome
is fucking stupid.

Was asked out at work
     by a customer I had
talked to once before.

I guess insurance
     issues would prevent that though.
I didn't think you did.

Trying to stick training
     wheels on your relationship
isn't gonna work.

Many of them are
     related to organized
crime and drug smuggling.

I'd totally say
     I'd buy that shirt and then not
[deleted] I don't.

I am still for no
     wiretapping, spying on
citizens, all that.

I don't think he finds
     your relationship thus far
meaningless, either.

like eye vs skin
     primer or just in general?
I'm sure you'll do rad!

That's a quote from our
     group leader that kind of stuck
with me my first week.

Hot if boyfriend or
     someone I'm talking to Not
if random stranger.

[deleted] I read
     the first three books the summer
before 4th grade.

There's no incentive
     to 'swindle' people into
being part of it.

My last phone call was
     about asking my mom what
she wants from the store.

I despise children,
     so I was prepared for those
when I took the job.

Maybe not? It's just
     that I drink the whole thing by
myself every time.

Personally, it was
     just never worth it to me.
To each their own though.

If that was the case
     we would've blown through Iraq
in about two days.

Peace, dude. It's based on
     Karma. Doesn't matter how
old the account is.

Oh, I don't think it's
     out of the question that they've
cracked the encryption.

This is especially
     true with games because *you can't
just stretch the graphics*.

As for what the "force
     carrier" for gravity
is, well... we're not sure.

I don't think the chop
     is politically incorrect
at all, personally.

commit to bring four.
     Whenever I want to try
something new. And, yes.

The reasons to stop
     and smell the flowers, outweigh
the need to hurry.

Getting the rest is
     not that difficult after
those tutorials.

The guy went to pick
     up his radio that had
fallen on the floor.

No one has ever
     told you that you have to sell
steak knives door to door.

I *will* use his quotes
     as I see fit and I *will*
give him due credit.

Both of you posting
     so far sum up the divide
in my own feelings.

The equivalent
     to using a weight machine
to use a clothes rack.

They have clearances
     and are there solely to deal
with issues like this.

It makes more sense if
     you actually had a keyboard
that supported it).

And that's all I need
     to spend on diapers until
she is potty trained.

I love my long legs.
     I'm easy to find in crowds.
I can reach tall things.

I don't even know
     what the ad was for, but damn
that was annoying.

So is your casual
     group all chipping in and then
keeping what they draft?

changing world events
     to this model should address
quite a few issues.

There's tons of other
     things, but these are the biggest
ones I can think of.

It would be the most
     hilariously racist
sitcom of all time.

If we weren't family,
     I would not spend time with them.
[deleted] How much?

But I kinda new
     what happened so it wasn't
always exciting.

You are more likely
     to be killed by lightening
than a terrorist.

Awesome. I did not
     plant any carrots this year
but plan to next year.

Check. Sweater? Check. Jeans?
     Check. Alright ma, I'm all good
to go climb that crane!

At first I wanted
     the jogging stroller, still do.
What brand did you have?

I'm unattractive,
     but I've got a huge penis.
I'm still an asshole.

where do i sign up?
     Something, something, Bob's Burgers?
I kind of agree.

The line of barbell
     stations is also kinda,
how do I say, cheap?

Oh and it's spelled axe.
     Any other questions? Like,
a can and a half.

And I don't mean trying
     to read the Book of Mormon
for eight hours solid.

A sense of humor
     has been important over
my five day journey.

If that little girl
     in the picture can do it,
ask yourself: Can you?

Both of these affect
     the rate at which cold gets put
into the cabin.

Chinese people feel
     this way, they feel that rulers
know whats best for them.

[deleted] I would
     recommend playing direct
sequels in order.

Let me think about
     how to make this and I will
see what I can do.

..are you alright? No.
     Are you sure? Where did you get
such an idea?

It should be the best
     post from like two days ago
and see what happens.

His product is what
     America, by and large,
wants from pro wrestling.

It doesn't. I've had
     water straight from a glacier
and it was awesome.

[deleted] Just wait...
     If you tie the knot, shit gets...
lazy and sloppy.

Surely being on
     tv and the biggest show
is a benefit?

But you have to go
     online if you want to get
your Walmart [casket.

I searched all over
     the apartment but couldn't
find him anywhere.

More games need to go
     that direction [deleted]
[deleted] That worked.

Too many youngsters
     who haven't been introduced
to Monty Python.

I'm hoping maybe
     he's matured a little bit
in that area.

No man that's Gandalf
     the White! yes, long time ago.
It's like my friend Steve.

The point of filler
     is that if you skip it you
won't miss anything.

Best thing we can do
     is not let this story die
in a week or two...

I have been looking
     for a singer featherweight
for so many years.

Probably the last place
     you'd expect someone to use
formal names for things.

I'm surprised they're still
     using classes for column
spans, and not includes.

Now all I see is
     shit about discussions, when
I want a quick laugh.

[deleted] I stepped
     on a big piece of splinter
from the hardwood floor.

Though it would awesome.
     I think long and slauson switch.
But I could be wrong.

Good call. I just hope
     people who saw his comment
figure out it's wrong.

To feminists, men
     are an untouchable class
and should act as such.

The "why" is because
     someone disgusting did that.
I think you know "how".

You're actually going
     to earn some money from this.
That's the crazy thing.

Marshal: Bursting through
     the wall, I crawled through and poked
Tim on the shoulder.

Six years later he's
     fat and the dominant one
over his brother.

You have so much more
     courage than you are giving
yourself credit for!

Like half of English
     is already borrowed from
other languages.

No, but it is more
     fun to describe a pretty
person in a book.

Suddenly the lights
     go out... [SIERRA. HOTEL.
INDIA. ECHO.

Heyman says that he's
     making the wrong decision,
but this is on him.

He's a grower..! "If
     you were an animal, what
would you be?" Um... What?!?

I definitely
     agree with the split second
understanding part.

If it was a myth
     then, it was never going
to stay one for long.

It is more than their
     yearly salary of their
entire household.

Stop being a dick
     about it, I use RES too
you special snowflake.

what is the ip E3
     doesn't start until Tuesday
Don't you have TV?

He should be able
     to find unpaid or paid work
quite easily there.

Maybe. (Not the point
     I'm arguing.) Is it theft?
Not by any means.

I don't understand
     or even notice fashion
pretty much at all.

Nobody who would
     make a wish in the well would
worship it also.

Anyone who says
     Lebron is not clutch hasn't
been watching him play.

Website for it? Price?
     It's so weird that in the right
color, I'd wear it!

In life you only
     regret what you haven't done.
You're the perfect age.

What perceived color
     would the universe be if
there was no color?

During the summer,
     you should focus your efforts
on long, slow distance.

Throughout? So he'll come
     back to life and die again?
The purge has begun!

At that age, there was
     only one answer for me,
and it was 'Fireball'.

There should be a lot
     more to this than 'ladies be
careful out there'. Christ.

So I'm guessing you
     are part of the Arkansas
prosecution team?

[deleted] Nice. Nice.
     I love Aussie chicks. Did you
like faint while cumming?

Nope. Just change it from
     "Icons" to "Detail", and then
sort by name, right? Nope!

Plus you weren't really
     being a douche, just pointing
out something I did.

Sure, they might cost more,
     but the point of a laptop
is mobility.

We don't want to make
     enemies since most people
agree with our goal.

It's all in good fun
     until it got posted on
the internet. Thanks!

It basically lists
     what numbers call which numbers
and how long they talk.

The point I was trying
     to make is they do care what
gamers are up to.

someone dun goofed Nah.
     We had people going through
our trash all the time.

Just waking up next
     to each other, feeling safe.
Everybody won!

I'm a bad swimmer
     and I feel like working out
with friends would be weird.

I think most of us
     think of "cured" as someone else
treating our "illness".

If you do, you are
     guilty of a federal crime.
That's what Snowden did.

If you have a blue
     flame you shouldn't be getting
much soot anyways.

[deleted] If that.
     Hell I just run and hop down
to the bonfire.

The hospital will
     send you back home if you're not
to a certain stage.

Unlike some who are
     automatically "heroes"
because of their job.

It's long overdue
     in the US and at this point
I doubt it'll happen.

Love the neck on mine
     (5-string). Sounds good, comfortable,
pretty versatile.

Jordans bulls couldn't
     do t, the fucking heat won't
with this current roster.

As a lefty, yes.
     That's where I always see them
when I'm stocking up.

[deleted] Make sure
     you don't have male and female
rats in the same cage.

And probably not from
     Germany. Well sadly you
are at least partially.

I eat less throughout
     the day if I have something
like eggs for breakfast.

This was a good band.
     Great band. Not bad, but it's no
Riders of the Plague.

My name is Allan
     I get em for 95c sir, you
just ate a cactus.

So use them. They aren't
     banned you just don't get karma
for them anymore.

I guess I know what
     I'm doing! Just moved from there
in January.

Thought I blew out both
     my driver side tires from
how bad the road was.

You haven't figured
     out who is really behind
this yet? Cow people.

The tutorials
     that are there at the moment
are all for starters.

Not a clue. My friend
     (his tower is the green one)
named it so maybe!

Flame because fire was
     awesome and in my mind, if
you touched it you died.

THERE CAN BE ONLY
     ONE! HE WAS CHOSEN AND NO
OTHERS ARE WORTHY!

Plenty of high tier
     streamers do stuff like this too.
Stay salty, my friends.

I knew someone who
     was named Bruce Wayne (some last name
I can't remember).

Will you continue
     to let the government stand
on you forever?

Anyone know more
     about this half time music?
Is it Brazilian?

it's more interested
     in taking our money than
sticking up for us.

(disregard the fact
     the weak point is highlighted
automatically).

it's cool if you want
     to a survey, but it needs
to be more even.

From experience,
     wouldn't kraft mac 'n cheese be
called poverty chow?

[deleted] She's not
     my dealer, some of my more
naive friends met her.

Awesome. This whole thread
     has me excited for some
buffalo football.

Jesus, drivers like
     you drive me nuts every time
I drive. Lol.

I try to go cheap
     with mine because he just likes
to rip it all up.

How many PCs
     from seven years ago can
run the newest games?

If that's not a good
     indication of sharpness,
I don't know what is.

The fact that they are
     being 'shady', doesn't help
their situation.

What if various
     Middle Eastern countries were
armed or vice versa?

This is the exact
     mentality that i made
my post to combat.

then they start to see
     their boost drop down as some more
players join the zone.

If you want to eat
     steak or live somewhere nice, you'd
have to work for it.

[deleted] even
     though Socrates died for his
right to post them, right?

She was massively
     more attractive when I got
to know her better.

The main story here
     is about Simon Cowell
getting egged last night.

That would probably get
     much more visibility
than on the 4th.

It's a perfect choice
     to get people's attention.
[deleted] Nice score!

I've heard that reference
     on three different popular
shows in the last week.

It's actually quite sad.
     Ron Paul's rhetoric matches
his voting record.

when you tell people
     you're american is there
any reaction?

[deleted] I'll join
     you when I have funds to do
so [deleted] Jo.

You might be asking
     yourself "How is the box worn
but the toy untouched"?

[deleted] Can you
     imagine a team that does
better than the Reds?

Some people swear by
     epic duels, but I think
that game is garbage.

Having a cheater
     for a so My passion is
drawing and coding!

Makes just as much sense.
     You probably try to kill flies
with a sledgehammer.

Look mom, I'm Master
     Chief from Halo! I can flip
this truck with my hands.

When we're feeling hot
     dogs, we just hit up Village
Coney since it's close.

A quote comes to mind
     "A man is whatever room
he is in right now".

Personally, I'd hope
     their salaries are at least
decent if not high.

Good job staying strong.
     I made a pun! You must go
to some great parties.

Nobody ever
     accomplished anything by
being meek and mild.

I'm sorry you've been
     going through a rough time, hope
things get better soon.

That's fine and dandy,
     just like you can isolate
parts of your buttocks.

I go to college
     with someone who steadily
banged Andre Drummond.

Do not be pushy
     if people aren't interested.
Yeah, very fluid.

You need only walk
     up those steps and the Iron
Throne is yours at last!

Your grandma believes
     the government really killed
Bin Laden? Lucky!

I think Infamous
     is fun and all but it lacks
so much potential.

I don't even know
     why-- I mean, no, I know why,
it was Jessica.

My cousin almost
     got into an accident
because she was high.

b. Vulgar An act
     or instance of sexual
touching or fondling.