Reddit Haikus

So, I'm not sure, yet,
     whether to go with a mix
or just get a Lab.

Go figure. Is you
     answer about seeking truth
and answering why?

Its fucking fiction.
     Poor kitty. Good that the cat
is in a good home.

It might be worth trying
     to talk him down about it,
though, for his own good.

Seeing his story
     unravel really had me
connected to him.

I enjoy my life
     as it is, and I'd keep right
on enjoying it.

All they may say is
     "October" because that's what
Apple is saying.

They don't generally
     introduce balance changes
in midweek patches.

But feminism
     is there to help the little
girl in the future.

Call em up and see,
     the worst is they don't do it.
Where are you located?

Now I don't know what
     to believe about this made
up children's story.

That said, there's nothing
     wrong with an extremely small,
intimate wedding.

*CHUNK* I felt the blood
     drain from my face. I saw stars.
Everything slowed down.

Great run but Hunter
     "Sorry Chris, we're sending you
down to AAA.

I'm the only one
     who wouldn't mind seeing him
come back for cheap, right?

You know, I actually
     think that cat's adorable.
I'm glad it made it.

Either stay there or
     continue down to Carmel
and spend the night there.

This is the closest
     I've got. I've found the button
I was looking for.

I hate when people
     take it but I can't get mad
because I offered.

I tell myself I'm
     still here because my kid is
relying on me.

Cutting out certain
     family was the best, hardest
decision I've made.

Furthermore, I can't
     imagine insurance is
all that cheap, either...

I never go out
     and do anything because
I don't have the time.

*hugs* You're a cool dude.
     Don't forget. The hardest part
is getting started.

I don't suppose you
     have a reliable source
saying they do that?

Probably means it was
     you bro or that it wasn't
going to work out.

Besides, there's no point
     in writing something for fun
if you don't like it.

Nice horse you have there.
     I've got a few friends that are
into this stuff too.

Id love you to jump
     into bed with me and not
jump out. Pm? Hey!

I'd also like more
     transit options like buses,
trucks, trains, and ferries.

But there were certain
     computer labs that were not
part of the system.

I don't know that much
     discussion or insight is
needed about that.

How much do you want
     to hate yourself when you look
in a mirror? `if`.

Just wondering, how
     much is an average oil change
at the dealership?

My mistake. The thing
     sprinters need in a program
is variety.

It was a command.
     "I'm not actually asking if
you're telling the truth.

The way the scene was
     acted did kind of look like
she was asking, though.

also, there's a fine
     line between fucking genius
and fucking crazy.

I appreciate
     your help and will apply what
i learned in battle!

Also candy canes.
     They never seem to last on
the tree. Sorry, yes.

Finally, I'm not
     saying that WAR is fine, nor
is everyone else.

I would verify
     the OP over and over.
[deleted] Indeed.

Sam Bradford is just
     bad The brain is a muscle,
like any other.

Someone fill me in!~~
     I'm an idiot. I thought
he was Ed Harris.

Believe me, I know.
     It is best you try to test
all that you can though.

[deleted] Title
     looks good, the opacity
is working for me.

She has only met
     my daughter once but she knows
how much I love her.

It prevented me
     from picking up an item
that's outside a cave.

That guys blows almost
     as much as your title does.
The Silver Surfer!

This wasn't awkward,
     it just looks like bieber can't
act for shit. Me too...

I was actually just
     wondering last night if there
was a name for this.

EN GARDE! thou shalt feel
     the pain Businesspeople are
trained to keep costs down.

The alleged chat log
     that described his hit query
was cheesy as fuck.

You've even been sad
     and wanted her back after
your messy breakup.

So the pitcher can
     pick up signs easier Source:
I'm a pitcher Hmmm.

If you ever need
     to make a warranty claim,
tell them it was gift.

Knowing what to do
     here is more important than
just getting a grade.

No, thank god. My son
     was super active ALL NIGHT
LONG and slept all day.

Your friends succeeded
     partly because he had friends
in high places, right?

This is probably right
     along the lines of what our
votes will be used for.

I thought it wasn't
     really humid in Texas...
I guess I was wrong!

Sure, if they only
     go to Delaware, they'll not
have this perception.

You claimed lithium
     ion batteries wouldn't
explode if punctured.

Private groups fighting
     violently for resources
that they cannot share.

Really? You're saying
     the fat guy ISN'T actually
fitter than a SEAL?

You're saying the fat
     guy ISN'T actually fitter
than a SEAL? I'm stunned.

So we use Daylight
     Saving Time to push the clocks
ahead by one hour.

You need a little
     buffer for when things go wrong
(and they will go wrong).

take a risk, be BOLD.
     Thanks! From my back porch, a few
blocks north of the pier.

I don't really see
     anything wrong with saying
ANY of these things.

maybe some minor
     people may have done that, but
you say otherwise?

[deleted] I feel
     like this post needs a lot more
comments than it has.

The lag was just not
     that substantial, nothing you
couldn't adjust to.

Be yourself, maintain
     your confidence, and just look
to have a good time.

I like the Z3, but
     I also have huge respect
for the Miata.

I think it's helping
     but only the next couple
weeks will tell for sure.

It was the smallest
     mobile home I'd ever seen,
and not the cleanest.

What they have *all* found
     is that shooting to wound is
hollywood nonsense.

If you don't learn from
     this, life will teach you again...
until you get it.

Keep driving until
     you get to Texas Motor
Speedway in Justin.

Your class list doesn't
     say "zero" spells of 5th
level, it says "dash".

I would think so too.
     Hold on to them and see how
the trends go brother.

Don't like that shirt but
     from the waist down this is nice.
What's Best Buy demo?

You wonder why you
     still have to hear it? Just stop.
I also agree.

If you haven't seen
     very much of the series,
much more is explained.

When she met a guy,
     she realized that is what was
missing the whole time.

She's damn beautiful
     but definitely awkward
looking around there.

"it'll take months before
     your organism goes back
to normal"... My ass!

So why do we turn
     on lights at night, OP? That's right:
*to lure the sun back.

I'm lucky enough
     to be on the table once
every year or so.

At the very least,
     he should know that he's a big
piece of penis cheese.

[deleted] Its still
     on his default old skin if
im not mistaken.

I think you might be
     stressing out more than you need
to about the kids.

We're splurging a bit
     on my dress and maybe some
camping equipment.

A big, deciding
     aspect, I imagine is
the scale of the game.

However, a few
     hours into the trip I got
really paranoid.

If you feel that you
     are in the right state of mind,
you will enjoy it.

There is no way you
     could eat this easily if
you weigh that little.

He was handsome too,
     and didn't look like all the Gay
Tony clones out there.

Hell, I deserved it.
     I only laugh on it now
because fuck that kid.

TO be fair, I like
     men and women alike who
will call out bullshit.

My vet was really
     gentle with them when it came
time to put them down.

Because we we're fit,
     we learned how to survive by
using our bodies.

just curious what
     your opinion of good jeans
is compared to mine.

Can't figure out how
     you could hold the battery
in to power it.

we'll look into it.
     Really... I wish I still had
my refunds. Me too!

i have been dry hit
     free for months, but that's because
im too lame to drip.

sorry but I clicked
     the link and I can't go there
ever again What?

[deleted] What did
     you do to get the Target
Baby coupon book?

And now you're doing
     the phone drop shuffle panic
hot potato dance.

Take it out and try
     alongside a new bottle
to see the difference.

Maybe she and her
     husband really are living
paycheck to paycheck.

Thanks for your replies.
     None of these are it. Who knows
what the problem is.

[deleted] Fuck her.
     Fucking bitch. Ass kickers know
that results matter.

We have a system
     in place already that would
need to be replaced.

Fuck off, if that was
     under my own bed it would
be dead on the spot.

Five year engagement
     Yea, I don't have a problem
with either of those.

*Smirks and laughs a bit*
     "Why of course you should. It's me
Celeste. Just... different."

If you tend to vote
     more Republican, as you
say you do, that's fine.

For example, when
     I feel stuck on orchestral,
I swap out some stuff.

Maybe you'll find you
     don't really enjoy riding
as much as you thought.

I love this. So much.
     ONLY A GODDAMN COMMIE
WOULD SAY SUCH A THING.

[deleted] That was
     one of the funniest things
I have ever seen.

Others don't like him.
     And yes, I think so Today?
Hmmm probably just lie.

Whoever thinks God
     gave Israel to the Jewish
people is insane.

American or
     Japanese car I'm guessing.
Should have went German.

Best way is to start
     out as friends so the friend stuff
never goes away.

I bitch about love
     bugs but stink bugs sound way worse.
Are they seasonal?

[deleted] Who knows,
     we will never know the truth.
Dead men tell no tails.

The ratio is
     WAY better than regular
recruiting events.

Anyone who has
     worked with doctors should know how
well that will go down.

Also, dat jiggle.
     Or before... I like The Slim
Reaper for Durant.

It's unethical
     and expensive plus it scars
the snake pretty bad.

Just because you *can*
     do something doesn't mean you
*have* to do something.

Thanks for the info.
     I was also curious
about beer as well.

Really enjoyed Tales
     too though, hope we see more MI
titles from Telltale.

But people also
     need to realize that debts aren't
the end of the world.

I mean, I still do,
     but I used to buy them on
everyone as well.

This is a good thing,
     it means you appreciate
life more hopefully.

I got you confused
     with Scott Adams. Never mind.
I shall file that one.

Plus i bet he could
     actually sound pretty darn close
to mitch if he tried.

Either that or I'm
     looking at it wrong. Then please.
Break it down for us.

Careful; if you were
     trolling any harder you'd
be catching Marlins.

After remembering
     what it was, I wrote my name
down, sat back and smiled.

Was in a parking
     lot and started my car. Bang!
The battery blew.

Cool man, cool. No, it's
     not that I don't think it's love.
I know it's not love.

And then you said you
     laid it all out before him
[props to you for this!!

I hopped on the scale
     tonight and I have gained six
pounds in two days. Great.

My ass and thighs are
     as pregnant as my belly.
I just don't get it.

Giving advice like
     "be confident" is useless
without specifics.

It really doesn't.
     Hah it's all good! I don't care
about the karma!

However she knew
     how many clients they got,
and what work they did..

You might be able
     to ask for a waiver though.
Regardless, good luck!

She just plays the same
     character in everything
she does. But I'm not.

My three toed female
     makes the same noise lol
she is a sweetheart.

When you draw something,
     all you can see are the flaws.
Don't stress about it.

Now, I hope you don't
     think I'm making fun of you
because I mean this.

And if I'm not, I'm
     not trying to offend it's just
not a place for me.

[deleted] Guys don't
     wear shorts as short as women
do, obviously.

If the US defaults,
     would investors still show up
for a bond auction?

I am not enrolled
     at the moment due to work
to save to move out.

Great guys don't blame you
     for your own assault. Ever.
You deserve better.

And man joe seems like
     he's in a really really
good and happy mood...

EDIT: Come on, what
     does "I live mystery pipes
and wires!" even mean.

You really can't win.
     Although dodging a bullet
often is winning.

oh wow didn't notice
     Shouldn't the incentive be
to win the most games?

The fucking goldfish
     died, but my parents refuse
to get rid of it.

Prior to print type
     and the printing press all books
were copied by hand.

They are great places
     to go and even to live
but they aren't *unique*.

How come property
     owners didn't clean up and get
things back in order?

The common ones look
     like pens with a mouthpiece or
even cigarettes.

I guess "peer review"
     no longer has anything
to do with "review".

Clearly I have no
     control on what shows up on
my own. What is this?

This doesn't change you
     being wrong, but we actually
agree on that point.

Maybe they just don't
     want to allow their children
to hear that language.

So it's a lot more
     about fitting the profile
than how fast you go.

.org *laughs* Good. Now sit
     your ass on that chair before
I take you in, ma'am.

I also team up
     with renters if they're outgunned
by owners, always.

Search for the ruined
     societies with ancient
technology first.

you don't condone his
     actions by understanding
his motivations.

Why can't they wonder
     around like all the ones on
the internet? YAY!

I would think it would
     have been perfected by now.
apparently not.

We made eye contact,
     I consciously nodded down,
and he nodded up.

Add me man. I love
     the calmness of the old man.
I want to be me.

It's a weird greeting.
     Yeah going back to WoW was
just not possible.

Does your girlfriend feel
     like she has to do something?
Why do anything?

Wedding food can be
     amazing (kind of depends
on the wedding though).

I calmly tell her
     to call Apple and they can
probably refund it.

It keeps your tension
     even, and makes the knitting
go a lot faster.

But it also helps
     in social situations,
I would imagine.

Anyone notice
     how terrible the extreme
northern dishes looked?

Y'all enjoy the match.
     Thought this was a joke and then
I clicked on the link.

*I reply, rather
     embarrassed that my good deed
blew up in my face.

**edit: As you may
     see, there are others giving
you shit for the name.

Gave money to his
     church and denied his children
braces for their teeth.

A graduate math
     degree isn't a golden
ticket anywhere.

[deleted] I had
     never heard the phrase until
Crocodile Dundee.

Keep the flag with you.
     Kid infantry should be groomed.
Flag should never tilt.

But won't he know there's
     something up when you offer
to drive him to LAX?

sure he can see how
     we broke the law, and how Tom
Clancy is awesome.

The only reason
     people use garden balls is
because they're cheap though.