Reddit Haikus

I don't care. It's not
     up to you to discipline
someone else's dog.

we're in love with you!
     and i didn't know the simpsons
referenced fire island!

I did some acting
     with Mark Cuban a few weeks
ago, nice guy. What?

So choose a side, men
     and women of the oppressed
and intelligent.

It's a comfort thing.
     Shit is it that obvious?
Canadian here.

That half of the brain
     can't "speak," but uses symbols
to express itself.

I've let people know
     but when they say something like
"we should come see you!"

a whole heap of cum
     just leaked out of me Put me
right off my pasta.

Rubber knives don't cut
     very well. Hans?... *Hans Brinker??
*...is that really you?

*...is that really you?
     You know, your skates are really
worth a lot these days.

Maybe it was this?
     I was just in Toronto
why didn't I see this?

If they don't really
     have money they do a good
job of hiding it.

Luckily for us,
     in that case Defoe excels
against weaker sides.

Their Q is so good
     and smoked right outside of their
eating area.

You SHOULD have treated
     the situation better,
not been so selfish.

Barking does not mean
     "I want to kill that", it means
"I am excited".

I know this doesn't
     really answer your question,
but I hope it helps.

UM grads often didn't
     come from Miami and don't
stay once they finish.

I just hope I don't
     try to eat somebody's face
off before then. YES!

So they let you bring
     the blankets in but wouldn't
let you sit on them?

[deleted] I read
     that as "State of Canada"
for a while. My bad.

Or he'll make me feel
     better, then tattoo more dicks
on my lower arm!

All he is saying
     is that people expect things
to be done for them.

That is not something
     that adds to the discussion
in my opinion.

Less adorable.
     Although it is what wakes me
up most of the time.

What about the 7.62x54
     russian ammo? Thanks good HIT!
It's shit. Obvious?

I'm disappointed
     every time I awake, each
and every morning.

Brian Griffin should
     be killed and not reappear
except for reruns.

It'll take time for things
     to stretch but you've got nothing
to worry about.

I try not to let
     that happen, but often times
people speak the truth.

I'm sure I was asked
     the same question at some point
when I was little.

Be warned. [deleted]
     Oh sure! They are two separate
things, not related.

If you quit your game
     you'll see that the servers are
down at the moment.

Finding a label
     for my views is extremely
difficult to do.

It won't matter if
     you ID it after, it will
still have the old stats.

This thread makes me feel
     like money destroys people's
lives and controls them.

Keep your eyes open
     for Dr Who references like
Vote Saxon posters.

I like even more
     that I've never actually had
to use that process.

If you don't know much
     about this, look into it,
I was disgusted.

Tell people how great
     she is and how she deserves
every happiness.

But yeah, when it comes
     to judging strength, I often
have the same problem.

when pulling onto
     the drive up ramp the tires
hung off of both sides.

And then her baby
     turned out to be a little
maggot regardless.

Kids are being raised
     with no moral, no common
sense, etc.

Not for the person
     who got shit on, of course, but
for everyone else?

Notice there is no
     "to protect and serve" statement
on the side of it.

Well that school year was
     the first where we had a School
Resource officer.

About that last point.
     Some wood can sink if it gets
waterlogged enough.

Thanks for the feedback,
     glad I have another week
to think this over.

Maybe the more you
     pay, the more entries you get
up to a cutoff.

YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT
     ANYONE ELSE BUT YOURSELF
AND THAT'S THE ISSUE.

Yes, diplomatic
     immunity is granted
by the host country.

I was in the same
     marriage he was and I was
never unfaithful.

I miss the midwest
     And now it's mine. Portland is
going to get SMOKED!

I don't know about
     you guys but I evolved from
angry squirrel fish.

We did this, and soon
     after we were done, our hands
were on fire. For hours.

So yes, it wasn't
     targeted at murdering
innocent people.

I want to see who's
     list most closely matches mine
and find hidden gems!

Are you leaving out
     some crucial point that makes his
statement less bizarre?

However yours is
     quite beautiful. Oh my gosh!
That is too awesome.

It's not our mission
     to ruin other planets
like we are this one.

Also, don't make them
     cheat days, but rather cheat meals.
Edit for spelling.

I am now thinking
     that perhaps my shyness does
come across as 'cold'.

You mean I could've
     gotten sweet, sweet karma from
my wallet as well?

A few years ago,
     I was in high school, talking
to one of my friends.

Where's my slow clap? (much
     as it sounds like it I'm not
being sarcastic.

Well, there are always
     the older cheaper ones like
Ritalin as well.

or maybe he was
     hiding his true self all these
years just to be liked.

I had an Aussie
     friend who just laughed at me if
I said that to her.

As a side note, these
     types of design decisions
are a dying breed.

(everything else was
     just sleeved and sorted into
boxes sitting out).

This is fucking Pawn
     Stars guys. You are a pawn shop.
There is no drama.

I think it's comes from
     Antonia, but it's not
really a nickname.

I'd say anything
     that Prince Buster ever touched
would be a favorite.

Guess what: this will be
     true of _any_ sane syntax
for matching patterns.

Sometimes you only
     need the basic medium.
What about tough love?

Hopefully you won't
     have much cable TV noise.
I am so sorry.

(the one by the wrist)
     that's a classic "im wearing
my dad's clothes" mistake.

You ate the secret
     formula, you broke the rules!
YOU LOSE, GOOD DAY SIR!

doesn't matter what
     information you give, keep
Foster regardless.

He just wouldn't be
     up for the type of build up
play at Arsenal.

What was the time frame
     from "Let's put something to Mars"
until the touch down?

It seems to impress
     people more than just a list.
For myself, never.

What the hell do you
     have to do to get someone
that enraged at you?

some will hold events
     to give everyone a chance
to meet each other.

Was given lines, told
     what the store line was supposed
to be, everything.

But come on... You were
     sounding so damn reasonable
up until that point!

I've always enjoyed
     WoW's content until I run
out of stuff to do.

Players who couldn't
     beat inferno before will
be able to now.

My parents were sheer
     geniuses when my brother
and I were little.

The only thing is
     that the vocals kind of get
lost in the music.

*the reason you get
     hit twice is because you stood
in two explosions.

That's definitely
     going to deter you from
doing this again.

probably go through life
     thinking the superman theme
was the star trek theme.

Sure, it's good to keep
     your car clean, but you've also
got to live with it.

Nice find. At least Maine
     and Massachusetts are things
which are in your mind.

I've found just like you
     said, life plans enough cheat days
for you. It wouldn't.

(Sarcasm) Do you
     know what happened or are you
just making stuff up.

Leave. Don't waste your time.
     But really first rule, never
let them pick you up.

They tried to do things
     like trying a son because his
father was too ill.

I really really
     really need to stop using
my phone for this stuff.

Eating once a day
     and bringing home food doesn't
save any money.

at the time i was
     had been seeing my girlfriend
for a couple years.

I said, "Goose, why Goose?"
     He quickly said, "Because you
respect your girlfriend.

If that's what you want.
     Live the dream, lol. Chimp.
I don't understand.

lol Context.
     You were a fun person when
actually going out.

[deleted] Oh, do
     leave him and let us resume
our game of croquet!

Basically what I'm
     saying is, whatever you
listen to, own it.

Now, don't get me wrong,
     I believe churches should be
held to these standards.

RUN MOTHERFUCKERS
     RUN!! On second thought, say bye
to one of your friends.

He thought they were just
     exaggerated clubs. Nope.
Could you expand, please?

But if you feel it's
     what you want to do, sure, try
some acting classes.

Lots of heritage
     houses and buildings as well
as friendly people.

Matt Kemp ALWAYS stops
     and signs for EVERYBODY.
Always takes pictures.

that's unfortunate.
     I was not overweight when
I started shrinking.

I'm pretty sure they've
     earned just about everything
shy of the absurd.

I feel like Michael
     Madsen in Reservoir Dogs
all of a sudden.

I've heard those things put
     out amazing groups Please see
my reply below.

I actually didn't know.
     I don't want to rip him off.
Why did it go up?

My words to him were
     "Think about what you just said"
[deleted] Really?

I can't stand that jerk.
     It did? I thought it went down.
What is it at now?

Not sure what they're called,
     but they taste good and always
seem to do the trick.

SHE WANTED THAT CHILD.
     She and her husband were TRYING
for another child.

I would, at this time,
     like to point out that evil
does not disprove God.

oh honey you know
     I would, but you know I'll just
get you hot again!

You probably won't go
     out drinking and probably won't
speed excessively.

IMO most Dylan
     songs are better when performed
by other artists.

Things have been pretty
     interesting between Iran
and the US since then...

I think it's pretty
     clear that at times both sides were
gaming the cease fire.

You can pretty much
     not fear every spider here
and be pretty safe.

There was a bedroom
     idea for a kid whose
name began with "H".

When doing this hearts
     are shown around you (the one
giving the item).

If I see dudes out
     there, I don't want to paddle
straight out to the line.

I'm surprised that part
     is a point of confusion
and anger for you.

Nation states may be
     coming back in a big way.
At least for the PIGS.

Their sandwiches are
     made to order so they are
happy to do it.

It's no replacement
     for parenting but it works
nicely alongside.

Upset? Angry? Sure.
     Willing to take the person
to court? Of course not.

I'm an atheist.
     Retard. Go celebrate some
more honor killings.

Doesn't seem as hard
     as everyone makes it out
to be I suppose.

"BENCH FOR EVERY MEAL!!!"
     (still in the planning stages)
Enthusiasm.

Honestly, I've been
     more into garage, bass, 2-step
and techno lately.

As fun as making
     out is, I would rather find
someone to talk to.

Because we only
     want the same things repeated
over and over?

Is that from Michael
     Turner? Something tells me you
are not a Muslim.

he generally says
     "can i get the reset, can
i get the reset".

honestly i think
     repeating that line is his
secret to success.

Wait.. who are you dude?
     Some seriously intense
and detailed questions.

That guy was harder
     than Star Magician for me
I am retarded.

Gold Club i can do
     this message me back Tee tee,
what some kids call pee.

I'd definitely
     be tempted to send something
on these lines to mars.

I'm pretty sure they've
     been playing longer than that,
at least secretly.

I just want to see
     what my beautiful city
looks like all at once!

Yeah... I gotta go
     with the popular choice here,
Chamber of Secrets.

I can PM you
     some of my builds if you'd like.
Free version also!

What I'm trying to say,
     really, is, FUCK YEAH, BITCHES,
SCIENCE. I love it!

[deleted] Did you
     edit it so the background
would be more blurry?

You think only white
     people can recognize how
disgusting this is?

[deleted] Oh god,
     I can't know this! You just made
my fucking day friend.

I... wat I'm with you
     there, Insane is my favorite
song on that album.

One day you notice
     that there is a candy store
on the way to school.

I am curious
     what 'amazing success' is
from your perspective?

We disagree on
     this as well, as she prefers
tons of excuses.

The central air works
     great and is a lifesaver
in the early months.

It's ridiculous.
     [deleted] oh no i think
i missed the ac.

[deleted] oh no
     i think i missed the ac.
I read everything.

I don't care about
     the number, I want to know
what the problem is.

Why not Germany?
     I'm not saying we SHOULD, i'm
just saying we DO.

We call them physics.
     [deleted] Yeah. It's a thing.
And it's just silly.

Am I the only
     person who isn't bothered
by this in the least?

Evolution through
     natural selection simply
does not work this way.

Another neighbor
     decides to surround his house
with a chain link fence.

Your team are the real
     hero's in America.
Is that tobacco?

I'm using one from
     the bamboo series and is
quite happy with it.

Boy, is that a skewed
     acronym Are we really?
[Odds to win the league?

With your success do
     you see NASA becoming
more active again?

I need you to go
     buy me a box of condoms.
You're cool with that, right?

Or is being rich,
     enough evidence that these
folks are criminals?

True universal
     healthcare from the very rich
to the very poor.

I am not even
     sure that pitchers are getting
better than hitters.

End in a gutter
     somewhere Well we could approve
too, if there were proof.

[deleted] I know
     I'm late to the party, but
WHO WANTS WINE COOLERS???!!!1!

and you get a great
     reference at the end because
you gave them your time.

So much sadness here:
     The deceased, the wasted life,
the wasted childhood.

So i'm sure people
     were listening in but just not
acknowledging it.

Alternatively,
     Luke quite possible simply
has this detail wrong.

Either you don't know
     what "tops the list" means, or you
were making a joke.

I did a rapid,
     inpatient detox during
my last go around.

Bosses, friends, family
     and that's it. Other than that?
Fuck 'em. Let 'em judge.

It is sad. I hate
     the way it is directed
at men, so sexist!

That guy playing Pink
     Floyd and shunning the girls who
hadn't heard of them.

I don't think a pat's
     fan post has ever made me
this happy. Indeed.

GO BACK TO YOUR ROOTS,
     MIMOSA! I love how you
positioned the cards.

This should illustrate
     the fundamental difference
in our views nicely.

We then head over
     to a nearby pizza place
for beer and pizza.

Maybe this is too
     early, but I'm not sold on
DeMarco Murray.

Do you guys ever
     just pause and think, "Holy shit,
look at what we did.

The Canadian
     dollar is about the same
as the US dollar.

Then they tried throwing
     the trans folks under the bus,
and it still didn't pass.

I have mormon friends.
     They are conservatives more
then anything else.

Wish I could fly like
     spiderman Its the cutoff
switch for the fuel pump.