Reddit Haikus

Trust me, I'm black, (don't
     worry, whitey, I won't rape
you or steal your bike).

The fourth path, through what
     looked like a graveyard, was blocked.
All the paths where blocked.

Sure thing. You can just
     give me 396k since that makes four
perfect bags of 99k.

He just looked at me
     like I was crazy and asked
why it was funny.

So dumb. I'm surprised
     that cat was so calm about
getting its kid back.

Love it. if you don't
     like the post format, i guess
you don't want to play.

Source: I used to drive
     for, then became manager,
at a dominoes.

Both are great choices.
     [deleted] Wrong I made no
fashion critiques. No.

Usually they don't
     go out of their way to find
stuff to bust you on.

It is slow, and it's
     not nearly as exciting
as, say, The Shining.

Describe in detail
     the conversations you are
having with your wife.

Can confirm. Weirdness.
     Thank you so much for helping!
[deleted] Sorry!

All under a page.
     You really helped me a lot.
Thanks for all your work.

No, mating season!
     Thank you kind sir, I think you've
helped everyone here.

My lady in her
     finest, cant beat that and you
have to get your own.

Exactly. They don't
     even need to make separate,
male specific ads.

I suspect the first
     soyuz had something too, but
I might have missed it.

It's time to move on.
     How many people with brown
eyes in Canada?

[deleted] I don't
     see any proof of that. Source?
That is so awesome!!!

I'm definitely
     going to keep playing, no
worries there. We should.

Looks like they're back up
     again That's sweet! Thanks so much!
Fingering your dog?

I didn't find out you
     could do this until after
all this happened Shit...

Cheating is cheating.
     Gender is irrelevant.
You are a cheater.

I made sure to stop
     in Portland on my way back
from HI to Europe.

How is the prom queen
     supposed to follow this up?
Fuck everybody?

Yeah, I want people
     wearing just regular clothes
and being friendly.

Victorino struck
     out but it was a wild pitch.
He made it to first.

However, you can
     go so much further if you
want to with linux.

In the living room
     I would definitely get
rid of that carpet.

it's a zombie cat,
     so probably snowball i I'm
bothered by this song.

"Worship me, because
     I will fuck you up if you
don't." And no wonder.

Most of them gave not
     one shit about the Beast or
his false religion.

You didn't ask me what
     I thought of other racist
nationalist movements.

Use the program like
     7-Zip to extract everything
into the folder.

I always feel like
     MoJo is "*just* a bad bounce
away or something.

Yeh just working on
     the assumption he isn't
depressed and just bored.

They control their own
     destiny" What the fuck is
wrong with you people?

Not from his father,
     I'm not sure about his mom,
I never met her.

"Uh... no... I didn't go,
     and they didn't say anything
about your father..

Hardly any cars
     and a lovely view "You can
tell it's a model.

NICE They missed a shit
     ton of calls and called some weak
ass shit ones so far.

I don't care if it's
     Myanmar, Burma or inner
city Chicago.

Whatever the web
     application pool account
Project is using.

This conversation
     has revealed more than I could
ever hope for. Me.

Without knowing what
     you're currently invested
in it's hard to say.

Spent the last couple
     hours getting my wife packed up
for a business trip.

Which is why I find
     the whole gun control issue
rather frustrating.

The only winning
     move is not to play What is
happening to Stanford?

Ha ha ha!! We eat
     home made burgers all the time!!!
Fly Hawaiian, fly!

I want one of those
     giant cardboard cutout heads
to hang up at home.

You'd put it in, press
     the button, and it would run
until it was done.

Please don't try this shit
     when you clearly don't know what
you're talking about.

This exact thought is
     what kept me going after
my grandmother died.

I make sure that small
     decisions I make fill me
with adrenaline.

Still think it could be
     done more sensitively though.
Last week's episode.

Because no one could
     possibly think that she is
vapid or ugly.

Because if you were
     depressed you would know because
you would be depressed.

I suppose you don't
     get the meaning of the phrase.
Just wet bread man, yuck.

I love my sister
     immensely and want nothing
but the best for her.

The key, actually, is
     to embrace the entire
situation too.

I'm amazed that they're
     able to keep employees
with that attitude.

(everybody here)
     Well, it took too long for me
to watch for starters.

Bright flowers are good
     for a clinic, especially
when its a bad day.

I work with both these
     bows all day and I highly
recommend the sage.

I haven't hung out
     with her outside the classroom.
How do I do so?

Guy still has this post
     up, and it's about someone
he thought was hacking.

Clever! [deleted]
     Sounds like you have a heavy
decision to make.

But was trying to point
     out that without a healthy
ego you get hurt.

If yes, and there are
     no problems with the urine,
I'd leave him to it.

Teeth problems you can't
     see could be stopping your pet
from eating pellets.

He was drawing his
     line in the sand, demanding
respect, and so forth.

My days of crappy
     video quality are
hopefully over!

Why should someone be
     uncomfortable because
you can't stop eating?

You're just an asshole
     my back has healed a lot since
I left the Army.

How can she kill her
     own father if he is killed
before she is born?

I'd be lying if
     I didn't say I was happy
as well. :P And thanks!

One of the females
     found a small plastic children's
toy and choked to death.

If you drop it on
     the corner, it will shatter,
because it's *brittle*.

Infidelity,
     poverty, not being good
enough in general.

Time to convert them.
     No just those who post all their
stupid messages.

Until my mother
     came raging out of the house
onto the front lawn.

I'm not out of shape
     or anything, in fact, I'm
in very good shape.

Understandably.
     I'd be annoyed with me too.
OP, you spelled "is" wrong.

Implying that she's
     "been doing it wrong" for years
seems like a bad thing.

Don't meet up with her,
     if you want to answer her
questions, call her up.

It's impossible
     to predict what might have been.
Ok, that's all folks.

They just put that on
     the bottle so you use more.
No repeat needed.

Cuddling a cat on
     the couch is ALWAYS a good
place to be. Can't wait!

As my mom says, "You
     can paint over ugly, but
you can't fix stupid".

When the voices are
     gone Yes, because acting is
serious business!

A blocked kick? This game
     is elevating to some
ridiculous heights.

So when can I start
     using this for my commute
to work? Not really.

With a little more
     looking I found what looks like
the page this came from.

Also (and I could
     be wrong) he doesn't really
look like a soldier.

Their main objective
     is to promote the *disease*
not their foundation.

I think you're reaching
     if you think the early game
aided either team.

It sounds morbid, but
     this can feed people and cull
that population.

Find the prettiest
     girl you know will be honest
with you, then ask her.

My parents were gone
     for the weekend and I had
the house to myself.

Regarding the spear
     i left it mysterious
and dark on purpose.

What do you mean "no"?
     If i don't like that table
i cannot eat there?

The HUD is 100x more
     minimalist without them.
Plus, they're distracting.

But if you're doing
     that same stuff anyway, then
you look just as good.

I'd like to see more
     solid related info.
I piss mercury.

But I suppose that's
     better than a pile of sick
regrets tomorrow.

According to South
     Park my buttocks and face are
in the wrong places.

They are NOT super
     safe with "no adverse effect
to any organs".

Sometimes we'd watch porn
     together and masturbate
next to each other.

Logan and Patty
     have been good but kennedy
needs to step it up.

If going gluten
     free makes you feel better, then
STOP EATING GLUTEN.

Powered windows are
     not affected by being
submerged in water.

I am already
     upper middle class so I'm
quite comfortable.

It over cures them,
     which is the main cause of cracked
prints in the future.

And no, I wouldn't
     think he was breaking his vows
by transitioning.

I don't understand
     why you would pick after some
random dudes numbers.

If you say, "Someone
     like you should have a drink," then
that's more positive.

I thought the series
     was going to be good, but
I didn't expect this.

luckily i've been
     to a quarter of those just
by walking around.

How selfish can you
     possibly be, possibly
be, possibly be?

The lack of pellets
     in his diet certainly
aren't affecting him.

Maybe my ward is
     the only one that actually
covers everything?

Tracker says he's still
     on the bike, but his last check
was a while ago.

The dropping of them
     on the ground and the silence
is so unnerving.

I has... doubts... Wait.... bones?
     As in, the bodies were just
left there after death?

Spoken like someone
     who doesn't know what the hell
he's talking about.

Better double check,
     is the fine print that always
gets you oh well FINE.

[deleted] I'm not
     sure what laid off means but I'm
assuming it's bad.

That they can become
     safe for society is
dubious at best.

Where the dude kills his
     superior officer
then himself is rough.

Thanks for the info!
     They also don't play high school
hockey, so there's that.

Brady Hoke doesn't
     have the guts "I'm here" Which would
be true, more or less.

They do care about
     littering, but then again,
it's nice that they do.

Hey guys, just got here,
     how is everyone doing?
He's shy, pretty cute.

Also I'm very
     baked right now so I hope I'm
not being creepy.

[deleted] I ate
     chocolate cake, which is pretty
uncommon for me.

Plus, you never know
     if that hairdresser will be
the one you marry.

But, I'm bald these days,
     and I can shave that myself
and save the money.

I love them both, but
     your answer sounds good to me!
So fucking nervous...

It is, if not *the*
     best, one of the best things you
can experience.

I got medicine
     so that has been helping out
with the nausea.

Lastly, I have heard
     your responses many times
from many people.

When you do things right,
     people won't be sure you've done
anything at all.

I wish someone had
     said it's not about style, it's
not about effect.

I'm on a diet...
     but today I sort of "slipped"
and ate way too much.

Only part that sucks
     every little scratch I get
itches like crazy.

Shame that people seem
     to overlook it for WoW
clones or what have you.

He's been in Gamblers
     Anonymous and working
the steps for five months.

Because for the first
     time in my life I don't want
to become my dad.

Is your neighbor Marc
     Stoner? Because I'm pretty
sure these are his dogs.

Fonda And that's when
     Henne will be throwing the pick
6.......during garbage time.

We used those plastic
     seat covers and floor mats where
I used to work too.

Get an apartment,
     you spawn there every time you
join a new session.

Probably used the same
     password for email and steam
or disabled guard.

You are correct, it's
     from the most recent issue
that came out this week.

Not hard, like don't break
     their hand or anything, but
just a nice handshake.

That's not rain!" *doesn't
     take my eyes off of Alec*
They've ruled for too long.

Or if you happen
     to have an old pair lying
around I'll buy em!

He is interested
     in discussing the issue
and making his points.

hard rock and techno
     is a little bit beyond
where it performs best.

Can't think of any
     shirts that fit especially well.
Most things fit "ok".

It's impossible
     to pick up good enough speed
t make it worthwhile!

Your mom as a kid
     don't count. [deleted] Puppets.
Hello and welcome!

Well, at least I'm not
     miserable during the fall
or spring anymore.

Very interesting,
     I hadn't heard that before.
Thanks for the info!

That amuses me.
     Such a complicated name,
I use Mike instead.

Here's the deal. If you
     don't have some muscle built up
you'll never look toned.

In High School I should
     have done my fucking homework.
i should have studied.

So many regrets.
     And the worst part? I never
learn from my mistakes.

Literally nothing
     has gone right for anyone
in this overtime.

Yea, I think if you
     really wanted to die you'd
find another way.

if you buy a home
     and don't live in it and don't
rent it out either.

I'm not offering free
     streams today. I was tired.
That's my excuse No.

Once the battle is
     over, they will revert back
to their normal selves.

I personally feel
     like that is double standard.
Lol sorry.

Like island visits
     for flowers, beetles, and sharks
last so fucking long.

No species going
     to magically come along
and stroke your egos.

It didn't hurt at all,
     and I didn't know it was back
until I pulled out.

We fully intend
     to raise our son to also
become a great dad.

Let us know if you
     are having hard time finding
someone to talk to.

Congratulations
     on staying infection free,
but it could happen.

It's a toy. What is
     the point of a fixed blade knife
that isn't full tang?

I would have never
     learned Greek well, and would never
have taken Latin.

drones are replacing
     our human pilots, whether
you like that or not.

But I'm just going
     to go ahead and tell you,
your parents aren't right.

Good luck and stay strong.
     Oh, I think you're right actually.
Indeed! I missed you!

If a truck driver
     tried this in Russia there would
be two accidents.

I like the way you
     put that album together.
Beautiful kitty!

My mom force fed me
     more than a few when I would
have ear infections.

Was the defender's
     foot out of bounds while he was
ripping the ball loose?

If it comes to *that*
     point she isn't a woman
worth wasting time on.

Going purely by
     numbers, isn't the Costco
contract plan better?

Since I saw this I've
     never put the full lights on
in any party.

GO FOR IT Life I'm
     interested, are you willing
to share this number?

See I've always gone
     front to back, and followed up
with a back to front.

Anything above
     that in Michigan and you
are being ripped off.

I would be inclined
     to believe this but would love
to see evidence.

Who could this man be?
     Friend made it. [deleted] Yes
we have a talley.

Buy him some crappy
     velcro sneakers and make him
wear those out instead.

I use inverted
     guard more as a transition
than a stopping point.

Just don't drink today.
     Congratulations! Well done,
glad you got the job!

Even we will see
     from our side (what exactly
is going on) right?