Reddit Haikus

especially as i'm
     in bed deciding whether
or not to munch out...

The first and only
     time I ever tried absinthe,
I was not prepared.

We've simply entered
     phase two, when machines replace
workers directly.

But it also may
     be a statistical glitch
in how it's measured.

It made physics class
     worth going to since his hate
was funny to me.

Pulling a pint is
     not "my every wish," and it's
not rocket science.

All the things you'd find
     on a normal desk, just shoved
to one side of it.

It's basically fried
     chicken that is loaded down
in different spices.

I've only had two
     in the last year and I hope
I get another.

Game? Just remember...
     if you are playing any
game from Paradox.

You guys are gonna
     have to be okay with cash
or credit card though.

People believe it.
     I dated one in highschool.
Almost did just that.

Only one active
     sim per number. It's the Browns.
We'd probably get both.

FOREVER? Start by
     initiating contact
throughout the evening.

I hate reading books
     because they've always come off
as homework for me.

i actually like his
     early stage presence better
than in the late 90s.

Why do you suppose
     the predators among us
target the unarmed...?

Duh. Mine likes to flush
     the toilet repeatedly
while I'm still on it.

The challenge mostly
     lies in how you interact
with your server mates.

I wish I had spent
     more time having fun and less
time finishing quests.

I agree that you
     were harassing your teammates
and deserve the ban.

Yet at that point you
     might be able to find out
what they actually want.

It will tell you what
     Internet provider you
are connecting through.

When it comes, I get
     the fuck up and ride that wave
as long as I can.

If she talks about
     other guys just tell her how
much better you are.

Not sure of the name
     but I believe that it's close.
I could be wrong though.

Clarity slider
     and increased saturation
on the eyes for sure.

That holds a pretty
     legitimate fear factor
and this brought it out.

That is weird. Have had
     mine forever and it is
stable as a rock.

Maybe.. maybe not.
     See how it play out? But why
didn't R* think of that?

*He smiles* "Yeah. It was
     on Mars when we finally
went through with it." Wrong.

It used to be all
     over the floor, now it's all
over everything.

'Soft' brand has some cute
     low heels too, but I haven't
worn them personally.

The only person
     who could answer it is you.
Not me. Not your friends.

It would be nice if
     I understood everything
the first go around.

Use it for major
     transactions, use the Pointer
for everything else.

Are you planning on
     heading to the Sundance Film
Festival this year?

Get a camera, dump
     those balls on the lawn and fire
up that snow blower.

We can't wait too long...
     I don't want to miss our chance
to get through to her.

Really? I hadn't
     seen that advertisement, can
you send me a link?

Edit: also you
     can see a giant ass rock
in the landscaping.

[deleted] It's not
     easy being white, It's not
easy being brown.

Stick deodorant
     also works, but body glide
is perfect for it.

That might be a slight
     exaggeration, but you
get the idea.

Okay. [deleted]
     [deleted] TIGER PENIS
MAKE STRONG. YOU TAKE NOW.

Throw the challenge flag
     Donnie. Mine did the same, but
with the tin foil heart.

to send a PM
     to also be reminded
and to reduce spam.

[deleted] What got
     you locked into Recovery
Mode in the first place?

My daughter will be
     six in a month and we've been
reading them all year.

they both contribute
     nothing to society
except division.

Hope this all pans out.
     [deleted] No, I'm pretty
sure that was the truck.

D Rose is gonna
     come back really strong, as good
as he was before.

The only problem
     I have is that sometimes there
is a harder draw.

Do some more growing
     in general and then act like
you know everything.

Day game tomorrow.
     I'm taking a half day off
just to watch the game.

Oh, and it's a skin
     treatment (whatever that means...
but it can't hurt, right?).

The second drawback
     is obviously the price.
For me, it's worth it.

I like how he was
     thinking frugal if they weren't
passing out candy.

Share your opinions
     when appropriate, and those
with ears will listen.

Slow. Sorry I was
     sure he'd leave by now since he's
asked 4x in the past.

I know you probably
     won't see this, but my girlfriend
and I are big fans.

Even better, who's
     going to force the losing
party to pay up?

I was inspired
     after watching the movie
with my little one.

Went into the next
     room and proceeded to laugh
my ass off at [this.

there is one every
     wednesday afternoon at lake
ella by black dog.

The program was tough
     in some ways- mostly the time
commitment for me.

Mainly the falling
     action on a boneless or
dropping in wakes me.

But different colored
     pants are cheaper to buy than
different colored boots.

Hope that helps! I think
     he watched Red Dawn a little
too much as a kid...

I won't budge. If it's
     10am and the sun isn't out
yet, neither am I.

Stoicism? Yeah,
     I'm down with that. I never
got any better.

It's fantastic, it's
     really funny, has solid
action and nice art.

I didn't care, I felt
     bad that I let my anger
get to me that bad.

If you explain what
     you want and what you don't want,
they do a good job.

Being more active
     throughout the day has really
helped my sleep habits.

My parents are friends
     with a professor who has
several published books.

I usually get,
     "What's the matter? Why are you
so upset?" I'm not.

Lots of hydrogen
     bonding and polarity
causes some weird shit.

it's just a square root,
     so it's always positive.
you got the range right!

I would be very
     interested in how language
recognition works.

Also on Maui
     you should go to the black sand
beach, it's cool to see.

On the big island
     go see the lava flowing
into the ocean.

So what you're saying
     is I should call my order
in ahead of time?

Ahh yes I probably
     wouldn't want to stick around
after that either.

It *transcends* a game.
     When you join a server, you
aren't playing around.

It's been almost two
     years and I drink more water
then I ever have.

His role is going
     to be a middle relief
guy come post season.

More than a little
     uncomfortable when you're
happily taken.

Laugh at his attempts.
     Keep your emotions in check
and watch him keenly.

Just watch this to say
     you've seen a North Korean knock
off of Godzilla.

Both bikes are size "large"
     Giants. Why did the possum
fall out of the tree?

I'm totally cool
     with my cat eating Fancy
Feast in front of me.

Moreno seems boom
     or bust, but Mendenhall plays
for a shitty team.

Commodities are
     worth a lot, but when to straight
fights out in the world?

But that was the first
     grandchild so maybe the next
won't matter as much.

Can't wait to see more!
     Wait to have me, mom. I know
he said he loved you.

Pretty much tell them
     where you want to go and they'll
lay out your options.

Plus you saved money
     too so it was like you got
free cigarettes too!

If your name is true...
     Sup? Good Guy Satan Technic
is single player.

Now picture never
     being able to hear their
words, their voice, again.

It should be noted
     that he looked exactly like
Rodney Dangerfield.

My father has all
     kinds of tube and shit going
out of his body.

If something isn't
     correct, then I do my best
to not believe it.

Is this Gilligan's
     way of showing his brilliance
in other genres?

EDIT: I strongly
     encourage you all to read
the entire thing.

I think Michigan
     and Washington have better
odds than Fresno State.

Like the idea!
     We have a big field, straight down
into the city.

Hey you disagree
     with my opinion, you must
hate America!

Correct, and someone
     responded about Feinstein
which is incorrect.

Get some sort of bell
     and put it at puppy nose
height next to your door.

Now fight me. When peace
     is on a bagel, you can
make peace anytime.

I don't know about
     the other lines, as I don't
play them. Decent song.

Why has every girl
     I've ever dated done this.
Infuriating.

Like it or not though
     *boys will be boys* & *pussy
pass* are the same thing.

We just lost our space,
     clearly we are not better.
But that's not the point.

You know, as crazy
     as it may sound, that *must* be
possible, somehow.

You will probably get
     your ass kicked, but at least you
went out like a man.

These days I just want
     to find someone who I can
talk to and smoke with.

That is a chick (me
     thinks) Joke Op's head Uh, that sure
is a bunch of stars.

But I also hate
     how the game thinks it knows what
I need in my life.

She is feeling fear
     and doubt that the central point
in her life is wrong.

Merging on 35e north,
     when your already on 35n,
in rush hour is hell.

Okay. We don't care.
     TIL I'm fucking useless Sure
that's not Kim Jong Il?

[deleted] but did
     you really have to kill them
to take the picture?

Mr Bubbles is
     happily living in his
tank in our kitchen.

Charcoal if you plan
     on wearing it formally.
In general? Hell no.

I'd wear a crown, but
     *yawn* sure, teach your dog to pick
up shit with its mouth.

should come in handy
     for zombie outbreaks *applause*
This is very cool.

Do you have any
     ideas on why they would
stamp it quarter pound?

Now then, with girls who
     think like this just go ahead
and be nonchalant.

Why aren't your Parker?
     Your dad was a bad namer.
I'm not a rapper.

But I wouldn't try
     that route just for the random
chance they would send you.

You know though, of all
     places for him to go to,
this shocks me the least.

It is pretty chill
     to turn down a cigarette,
cigar, or a joint.

Hell, my favorite thing
     was just kissing and lying
with her, anyway.

It took me a few
     seconds to realize that hey,
that smoke is moving!

I'd be surprised if
     we didn't lose and lose badly
in Minnesota.

I turned around fast
     and punched him without even
thinking about it.

Thank you. my biggest
     concern is it's about 90F
here at the moment.

Eldest son: light brown
     hair, brown eyes. Second eldest:
Dark brown hair, brown eyes.

With the wars winding
     down I'd bet that 5811's regain
their hold of the dogs.

No. Will he get pissed
     and possibly try and kick
your door in? Maybe.

One problem for him:
     I caught his leg. And began
to twist it. Slowly.

The second Stuart king,
     Charles I, refused to consult
Parliament at all.

[deleted] You're right..
     so many "or" comments. Cool.
Thanks for the info.

As you can see both
     sets of examples happening
in this very thread.

Edit: It should be
     noted that I played the game
for about eight hours.

You did what you could.
     Ball's in their court now. French fries
and bacon stand out.

For what that woman
     said, I'm surprise the guy didn't
do more than a slap.

But no, the angle
     you are talking about would
not be effective.

Double Chili Cheese
     burger, Extra Tomatoes,
Pickles and Onions.

Most parents shouldn't
     be in charge of a pet rock,
let alone a child.

And a little sad.
     Was a pretty little town
not too long ago.

At least you got slings?
     Not sure how the atheist
part is relevant?

I quit then and there,
     but last I heard he is still
working there. So. Fucked.

Well, we have Cassel.
     I guess he's about the same.
Link didn't seem to work.

You beat me too it.
     You said you like rivalries,
give the Browns a shot!

But would you refuse
     if she offered to let you
bone her? Probably not.

That was especially
     impressive with such a quick
change in direction.

Poor guy. [deleted]
     That was the first thing that drew
my attention too!

It just won't put out
     the same power as a 4A
capable device.

you should literally
     be putting every single
penny into debts.

I'm not *super* close
     with either of my parents,
but I can't complain.

[deleted] It's great
     for tourists, as long as you
aren't rude or too loud.

Or maybe they could
     have a classic mode you could
choose from at the start.

Oh well, thus is life.
     Hopefully my folly can
help the rest of y'all.

And I'm betting you
     all generally regard me
as an asshole too.

If you can't beat em...
     They just look SO excited
for pancakes! You're on.

As soon as the bear
     got the hunters scent it got
the hell out of there.

You're not the only
     one, I bought every single
expansion, love it.

Go forth and use said
     airtight argument against
whatever you want.

Now you take this home,
     throw it in a pot, add some
broth, a potato.

Wouldn't it be more
     evil if the Browns somehow
win it now? Added.

The other two pair
     you're free to (at your own risk)
do with as you please.

The complexity
     won't make this process fast on
quantum computers.

it's like practicing
     strumming patterns on guitar
without changing chords.

Geez, how many times
     do I have to tell you not
to break the fourth wall?

I appreciate
     open weight like in nearly
every sport on Earth.

Yeah, every time we've
     had this discussion it's been
very reasonable.

They advertise more
     now, they also cut labor
costs to profit more.

[deleted] no dude
     epilepsy can happen
if you blink too fast!!!

These are hardheaded
     pragmatists, and all they care
about is money.

First of all I want
     to thank you for doing this.
What is your current rank?

What is your current rank?
     What is the most important
part of league to you?

And there is a fair
     chance that your college funds will
come out of his half.

im so curious
     what they must have talked about
and thought afterwards.

false positive rate).
     Authorizing more spending
increases the debt.

Mine is black with two
     orange pinstripes down the front.
The "don't have kids" part.

But this lady has
     changed my life for the better
in so many ways.

Diversity guilt
     tripping only works on whites.
Koreans don't get it.

I like attack speed
     and CD over healing%
over other stuff.

How long does it take
     for a baby to explode
in the microwave?

We didn't have to pay
     his signing bonus, or his
first year's salary.

If investing large
     amounts of money, I think
we could pull it off.

All part of his good
     taste which is one of the things
that drew me to him.

Fight club Jingle all
     the way The Santa clause Who
framed roger rabbit?

she gets what she pays
     for [deleted] I can see
the confusion, though.

Who else would he be
     going to kill other than
Todd and his uncle?

Thanks! Blood and sand! Scotch,
     OJ, bitters and vermouth
I think? Delicious.

They have enough room
     to gobble up all the good
young talent out there.

Also, you're a douche.
     That would be a cool feature.
Here's my dilemma.