Reddit Haikus

You're looking at every haiku that occurred on a Reddit comment between December 2005 and October 2016 (10.8 years). Some intentional, most unintentional.

The haikus make up 24,450,805 (24.4 million) characters or 4,519,927 (4.5 million) words. For perspective, the entire Harry Potter series is 1,084,170 words. This is 4 times the size of all Harry Potter books combined. It would take the average person 390 hours and 50 minutes (16 days) to read them all.

The haikus were extracted from 2,718,784,464 (2.7 billion) comments across 416,729 unique subreddits for a total of 80,908,650,976 (80.9 billion) words.

These pages are regenerated every 1 hour with updated scores -- please browse and upvote/downvote away.

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Page 1052 of 1746

Haiku #50620

I can cultivate
     your toilet into something
even I might want.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50621

They're just very small
     and only come out at night,
so you can't see them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50622

So they're designing
     shitty items for a game
that they've barley played.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50623

I could finally
     snag some of those pink pieces
I've been looking for!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50624

If you personally
     have a problem then don't read
the posts and move on.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50625

[deleted] I would,
     but your account is three hours
old, kinda fishy.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50626

I guess they only
     chose people who were legit
ruining their lives.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50627

Well, they are stupid
     enough to have a sitcom
written around them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50696

Which is why it gets
     met with such resistance from
die hard street skaters.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50697

As a man wiser
     than me once said, hate the game,
don't hate the player.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50698

[deleted] This. Yes,
     this is exactly what some
people need to hear.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50699

[deleted] Six year
     olds have silly ideas
like that all the time.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50700

I've said this before
     but my friend thinks her belly
button is not closed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50701

Go back and find where
     I have defended smoking.
Somewhere, anywhere?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50702

Neither is fast food.
     I'm really not certain what
you're getting at there.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50703

Oh moon ere past you
     glide, tell me, Tell me, oh where
does my loved one bide?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50704

Companies only
     spend time on things if they will
be profitable.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50705

So now I don't know.
     maybe Chamber of Secrets
if I have to choose...?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50706

I've also never
     heard of anyone having
these symptoms before.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50707

Ok, so I'm good.
     I will keep this all in mind
when I'm out shopping.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50708

I don't have any
     fancy controllers to plug
into my PC.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50709

There's no evidence
     to support that the shooter
was an atheist.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50710

[deleted] Cockroach
     Lover! Isn't empathy
more emotional?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50711

I'll call the sidebar
     immediately, that would
be a lifesaver.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50712

Have you tried lifting?
     It might make you feel stronger
and more capable.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50713

I do think Wish You
     Were Here and Comfortably
Numb are genius though.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50714

It's still not pleasant,
     but a little better than
the alternative.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50715

He gave me some great
     insight but I feel that y'all
can really help me.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50716

Once more, the brilliant
     mind of Gabe Newell saves our
precious games! All hail!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50717

It took me like two
     minutes to figure out what
the first picture *was*.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50718

I told her she would
     have to purchase another
kids meal to have more.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50719

From what I've heard, there
     are more investors than start
ups in Pakistan.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50720

Mind you I did not
     break up with her over that.
It wasn't her fault.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50721

I don't like her or
     Mitt, and their tax issues stink,
but this is stupid.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50722

Can someone help me?
     I've had them multiple times.
*Five Guys* is better.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50723

I ran into Bill
     and his wife years later, still
married with two kids.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50724

Your daughter might be
     the designated driver
that saves many lives?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50725

The pennies you could
     keep for their copper value
if they are all pre-1982.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50726

I love AE, but these
     are probably the ugliest
shoes they've ever sold.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50727

Damn You're not talking
     about karma, you're talking
about idiots.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50728

I respect people
     who disagree with me, though,
on the above grounds.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50729

Regardless, key man
     life insurance has nothing
to do with cashiers.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50730

You should probably re
     consider owning a car
for the time being.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50731

but not important
     for the moment. Didn't know that.
Thanks for the info!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50732

Turns out, I was just
     gaining muscle since I was
working out a lot.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50733

I saw the player
     aiming below the target
on some occasions.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50734

I don't really know
     what she means by this except
for the obvious.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50735

I know you haven't
     had the chance to drive yet but
what's the estimate?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50736

At least for the first
     few years, they want to see how
everything plays out.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50737

Don't worry, the guy
     on the left of the picture
watches Family Guy.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50738

She said: "No, I can't
     have it watery, I just
want fruit and fruit juice.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50739

I don't think there's much
     "thought" behind lesbianism.
My thoughts exactly.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50740

On the other hand,
     the tag is your most useful
deciding factor.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50741

If the packaging
     looks stuffed full, it's a good sign
that everything's there!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50742

Do you have any
     comments on the 'mining on
asteroids' mission?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50743

Staples like bread, eggs,
     milk are more expensive here
than anywhere else.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50744

If they were being
     paid, then the scholarship would
be unwarranted.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50745

Just so everyone
     knows, his accomplices were
hit pretty hard too.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50746

If democracy
     is worth its weight i n shit
that's the only hope.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50747

So much crazy shit
     that we take entirely
for granted these days.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50748

That'd be awesome.
     I could have a hearty laugh
session every hour!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50749

That's not accurate
     because it shows ten guilds when
there are only nine.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50750

My best friend discussed
     this with her ex and he still
cheated in the end.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50751

One Piece is good, but
     in my opinion Fairy
Tail is much better.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50752

If it's giving you
     headaches, it's probably a good
sign to take a break.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50754

I also avoid
     doing business with a shop
that would rip me off.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50755

Or are you not done
     engineering a better
one for the future?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50756

That said, I wouldn't
     mind having him on my team
if the price was right.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50757

It's a small sample
     but still an interesting read.
Why would you like that?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50758

Sorry, I do get
     impatient and frustrated
by stupid people.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50759

Best country ever!
     And they tried to go back there,
you know, on a boat.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50760

You're the first person
     I've seen that doesn't dislike
or outright hate it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50761

Do "haters" make jokes
     or do "haters" just not get
jokes when they see them?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50762

How about sliding
     i bet its pretty good since
you a nice concave?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50764

I know the book "Eats,
     shoots, and leaves" is quite funny
and informative.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50765

That'd finally
     give me an excuse to get
back into the game.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50766

Would you be able
     to see the stars as clearly
as you can on Earth?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50836

I didn't taper off
     or anything, and had no
negative symptoms.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50837

She was also shot
     herself (she is blind in one
eye because of this).

Score: 0          

Haiku #50838

The problem isn't
     Sweden, it's the United
States. I thought as much.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50839

o.0 Second question:
     Do you want to learning by
ear, theory, or both?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50840

You either move on
     to something else or admit
that you've gotten old.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50841

My friend is the most
     musically oblivious
person in the world.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50842

Unfortunately
     in most US cities it is
just suburban sprawl.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50843

Instead, I watched "Friends".
     Ok, Im here, there are trains
and fucking spring break.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50844

I stayed up all night
     watching and was inspired
the entire time.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50845

What is it about
     hungarian notation
that upsets people?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50846

You remember how
     you felt sad or embarrassed
or happy or proud.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50847

I Hate When People
     Capitalize Every First
Letter. Holy cow.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50848

Holy cow. I was
     expecting something pretty
poorly made, but... wow.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50849

It's not like we got
     revenge with two atomic
bombs or anything!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50850

But he doesn't cut
     fraud, waste and overpayment.
He cuts benefits.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50851

There are numerous
     trees that have hardly any
fruit on them this year.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50852

Plus I had to shed
     off all the relationship
and stress weight I gained.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50853

From my perspective,
     the only thing that matters
is legislation.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50854

Things that exist are
     not fairy tales, things that don't
exist might be, though.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50855

Sheesh. If I'm feeling
     motivated today I'll
recreate the pic.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50856

Wanna remind me
     as to why I have you tagged
as 'Hitler fucker'?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50857

He also spewed out
     magic spears from it and hit
almost every time.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50858

oh god grannies squirt
     Because a mass grave would not
have weapons or shields.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50859

It was weird because
     as friends he would usually
communicate more.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50860

I would also be
     greatly appreciative if
you message me one!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50861

Bad things will only
     get better if you refuse
to tolerate them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50862

Used the mayonnaise
     bit on a shoot in Woodstock.
You seem unhappy.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50863

Why complain? Now you
     don't have to worry about
getting shot or stabbed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50864

Also "Kim Jong Thrill"
     is probably the greatest name
for a track ever.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50865

[deleted] I'm just
     getting back into writing.
Here's my shot at it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50866

It's a spinach wrap,
     I told you that yesterday.
Eh, I'm a Christian.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50867

Everyone assumes
     someone else will ban Lycan.
No one bans Lycan.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50868

Maybe if pot was
     legalized it would limit
their increase power.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50869

Bullshit. How would you
     know when school started if you
weren't going to school?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50870

Keep in mind these were
     hors d'oeuvres, it wasn't a meal.
They were like locusts.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50871

People don't realize
     how much these legendary
buffs will change the game.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50872

What kind of outreach
     activities do you all
participate in?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50873

Did the glass get caught
     slightly on the seatbelt latch
and you hit a bump?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50874

Thank goodness we had
     Charlie around last season.
stay the hell away.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50875

Nothing I like more
     than talking about SU, just
ask my wife and friends.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50876

We call her Happy
     DeLorean is the 1st
one that comes to mind.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50877

Unfortunately,
     I'm only really talking
to one of them now.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50878

What kind of samples
     are you going to pick up?
I had this SAME thought.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50879

It is an ugly
     word thrown around with no thought
as to it's meaning.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50880

Where do you even
     remotely come up with these
insane ideas?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50881

lol If you
     aren't a confrontational
person hide the soap.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50882

So, first you should get
     to know yourself, and what you
need from a woman.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50883

Would it be able
     to flip itself back over?
Would parts of it break?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50884

How do we know you're
     not just trying to scam people
out of some money?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50886

I'm not sure about
     your minerals, but that pH
doesn't seem too high.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50887

The gold difference was
     minuscule enough that M5
can pull out ahead.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50888

You'll be fine to plug
     in a regular wireless
router in the dorm.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50889

I travel a lot
     and ask everywhere I go
and still can't find them.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50890

The cameras aren't there
     to bust you, they're simply there
to lower your speed.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50891

Anymore than 50g
     within a three hour stretch is
probably no bueno.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50892

That would be a good
     ending to that *needlessly
depressing* comic.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50893

It doesn't effect
     your day to day, so why do
you give a shit? This.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50894

I can't believe you
     diseased freaks actually support
these no talent hacks.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50895

I literally had
     the thing written out and then
didn't click to submit.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50896

So a large with one
     slice missing would be a large
medium I guess.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50897

Otherwise, he's not
     getting out of there without
being arrested.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50898

Heh, Flint, what a town.
     I dropped out of Kettering
at one point in life.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50899

What was the single
     greatest limiting factor
in landing on Mars?

Score: 0          

Haiku #50900

How was that a joke?
     Its a prophecy only
fulfilled through hindsight.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50901

Also if this is
     the case you do not belong
on the internet.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50902

Both might be wrong, but
     think about it man, they are
very different things.

Score: 0          

Haiku #50903

Crouching tightens up
     the deviation on both.
It just takes practice!

Score: 0          

Haiku #50904

Watching a shuttle
     launch is something everyone
should experience...

Score: 0          

Haiku #50905

[deleted] What was
     your biggest "OH SHIT" moment
during the landing?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51044

What's the point of this?
     As a current college student,
I'm not arguing.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51045

After you have some
     experience you can move
to hard woods like Oak.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51046

HEY, LISTEN! I work
     in digital media.
This is a troll post.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51047

by the time you build
     the second pylon I'll take
the third :S really.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51048

My new favorite word.
     Thank you, good sir I don't think
Shaq could guard Kobe.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51049

Maybe cheese slices
     is, but cheese is older than
the United States.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51050

That's the one I went
     home with right after and banged.
In the afternoon.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51051

That is the weapon
     the founding fathers wanted
everyone to have.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51052

There are maps showing
     everywhere that cesium-134
has been detected.

Score: 0          

Haiku #76862

"No employer has
     to employ Culinary
Union employees."

Score: 0          

Haiku #51053

Reinstalled that shit
     the other day and playing
the hell out of it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51054

If you think something
     shouldn't have to be explained,
then don't explain it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51055

I actually never
     noticed the flying monkeys
for some odd reason.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51056

I mean if one thing
     goes wrong, Curiosity
could have crashed on Mars.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51058

This is stolen from
     somewhere but I'm not bothered
enough to find it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51059

This is the first time
     I'm hearing of it and am
now spreading the word.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51060

But to this day, it's
     one of the most touching &
humbling things ever.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51061

If that what you call
     farm, than I wonder how much
you lost on each run.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51062

Going to start now
     officially What other
stuff is possible?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51063

Sometimes it takes weeks,
     months, or even years to go
get a pack o' smokes.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51064

usually I chat
     with people at the same time
as well. You guys rock!

Score: 0          

Haiku #51065

At this point, most or
     the entire team can buy
GAs for one last push.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51066

It may take a while
     to get the instrumental
area down fast.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51067

I like how you say
     I fall into the second
category, why?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51068

Oh well, his mistake
     that he will come to realize
one day. Alcohol?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51069

In this case, I would
     not pay for it, neither would
I even want it.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51070

[deleted] "Skyline"?
     Even before defeating
the corrupted eye?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51071

This means that there are
     NEW people with NEW interest
in guns. Maybe not..

Score: 0          

Haiku #51072

Our football program's
     been around since the early
1900s, we just joined 1A.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51073

I can't remember
     where I read that, but ot was
only yesterday.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51074

,secondly I think
     you are doing the right thing
having yourself checked.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51075

Especially if you're
     talking about the fung wah
buses Man up mode.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51076

They make no effort
     to avoid the easily
avoidable things.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51077

She was a freshman
     so I was wondering how
this was possible.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51078

For the last spot it's
     probably a toss up between
Jane Eyre and Fish Tank.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51079

Dumber than seeing
     how many jelly beans you
can fit in your nose?

Score: 0          

Haiku #51080

I wasn't the one
     who provided the study.
Check one comment up.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51081

And it seems that is
     why Stoner gets killed among
fans and media.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51082

Congratulations
     on obstructing the police
from doing their job.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51083

I'm not sure why one
     would assume that's what I was
going to assert.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51084

Tell em Mark sent you.
     You'll get the special treatment.
Be sure to tip well.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51085

My little secret
     is that my real name isn't
Nickel, it's Hannah.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51086

"There's only really
     one type of diabetes.
I know, I'm a nurse."

Score: 0          

Haiku #51087

My Dad kept griping
     to my Mom that the downstairs
always smelled like piss.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51088

All of these girls are
     either underage, or meant
to look underage.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51089

The girl was dressing
     sexy, so those poor boys just
couldn't help themselves!

Score: 0          

Haiku #51090

I can't imagine
     what would happen if she sat
in the grass all day.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51091

Seeing your results
     is persuading me to try
out Andy as well.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51092

some intramural
     flag football games, he didn't need
that shit in his life.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51093

You are so freaking
     adorable and well done
love the lip color!

Score: 0          

Haiku #51094

Thanks for the questions.
     Have an awesome day! You might
be right about that.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51095

Im adding a few
     more items today, some skirts
and a few more tops.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51096

I do not think there
     is way around politics
in this field of work.

Score: 0          

Haiku #16721

A marathon is
     not the space shuttle, you can
leave at any time.

Score: 0          

Haiku #51097

I joined a random
     game, they were using B class
cars, and it was on...

Score: 0          


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Page updated on Saturday Dec 17, 2022 08:00:29 PM PDT.

A Cyrus snafu.