Reddit Haikus

I don't even like
     reading the local paper
because it's constant.

it's ok, I can
     do accounting faster than
all those guys combined!

I simply agreed
     that the tidy little piles
seem unnatural.

Online petitions?
     I'm not a pessimist, but
you are joking right?

make the best of it,
     and don't stay together just
for the sake of it.

[deleted] That's... what?
     No. No. Wait, what? Surely you
can't be serious.

But kudos to you
     for having an (overly)
open mind, I guess.

Wait, you can put things
     in a toolbox, and carry
the toolbox around?

I saw this band when
     I was in the army down
in Arizona.

It doesn't seem like
     one lousy prayer before meals
is too much to ask.

Why not? Do something
     about it. Run everyday.
Learn a new language.

Whatever it is
     that you're not happy about,
just fucking do it.

I really wish there
     were a way to regulate
things like this fairly.

This hasn't come up
     in the TV series yet.
Did the bread work out?

I think my nail is
     too broad, I didn't think it would
be a problem first.

higher is better
     in terms of resolution,
go for the 1080p one.

"You know what they say.
     Behind every great black man...."
"Is the police!" "No."

My pinky follows
     my ring finger and destroys
the flow instantly.

She looks at me like,
     "cool, right?" And I had to hide
my disappointment.

[deleted] You can
     call your marriage whatever
you want to call it.

As somebody who
     lives in central Florida,
I can confirm this.

[deleted] Too far
     down but it's gotta be Hot
Rod for me! [Sick burn!

There's rumors that there
     is a new Star Trek series
in development.

Purchasing or sales
     needs to be outsourced for me
to progress further.

But I expanded
     on it and thought others might
enjoy it as well.

I can't seem to win
     games without him playing CAM..
those offensive runs!

That's intense! Have you
     managed to make a living
off of just writing?

Looks like Oregon
     players got some of the new
uniforms today.

Be nice to people,
     help when you can, and karma
will come back around.

But seriously,
     I like this version a lot.
Like seriously.

Bingo! :D The fact
     that there is no question mark
makes me think you know.

Makes me wish I knew
     some people to try those group
exercises with.

I hope you can come
     out when you think you're ready
if that's what you want.

If you haven't drained
     your network yet with your job
search you could keep trying.

I always shaped mine
     into perfect little flat
topped pyramids. ...wow.

Use your rational mind
     and don't succumb to bullshit
like most people do.

My order was placed
     not long after that, I'll let
you know how it goes.

The silence you can
     experience there at night
is out of this world.

I really enjoyed
     Hamburg a lot and will be
coming back for sure!

And it's a suburb,
     there is a serious fire
once every three years.

What to do when you
     getting dominated, what
to change in your build.

What to afraid of.
     Some basic mechanism
(lane freezing, peeling).

I can finally
     hear what I smell, or smell what
I hear. Whatever.

Since I've been here it's
     looked like the contests have been
pretty popular.

Why has she taken
     out a restraining order
against me? Hey guy.

I'm not attacking
     student athletes and yes, there
others like your friend.

:D [deleted] What?
     Are you buying retail or
going to auctions?

Here is the total
     truth about who is perceived
as the "rich" these days.

They're obviously
     more physically fit, making
the game more intense.

Besides, I'm a lord
     with servants and shit, they'll make
sure the fire stays lit.

My personal taste
     has fuck all to do with it.
Definitely true.

Your TI would rather
     send you to sick call than see
you get recycled.

You violated
     the physical privacy
and space of her friend.

Many people think
     that gays will drop on to their
knees for anyone...

Next time they really
     need to use Vietnamese.
Oh good I'm still tall.

Im sorry. Perhaps.
     Again, I'll figure it out
in a day or two.

Fuck off ya west brit.
     How much would it cost to look
like a pro rider?

I waiting to get
     the master destruction spell
before I kill him.

Kinda obvious.
     Perfect. Like exactly how
good is this soda?

These poor people went
     to a haven, and ended
up losing their lives.

Carry on. You don't
     hold yourself and the people
you love close to you?

Simple solution.
     Go out by yourself, but hang
out at hotel bars.

Aye. [deleted] DO
     want that particle effect.
This is amazing.

Obviously I'm
     not going to change your mind
but hey, food for thought.

indeed, and I would
     like to see them "in action"
as well. He's dead, Jim!

I won't know unless
     I try to learn from other
people's perspectives.

:P Insert movie
     quote here Take it on the chin
and learn his lesson.

Not a bad offer,
     but I won't accept this time.
Thanks for your offer!!

Yes, I believe so.
     The thing is, though, it is not
that it's cherry picked.

I would have much more
     time to get stuff done and be
much more productive.

I'm not trying to be
     rude or anything, I just
can not see buck teeth.

There are two people
     seriously competing
for the election.

And it's more about
     what is right over what you
desire, correct?

When we learn to see
     objectively then it can
become objective.

Same reason as yours.
     And people need to shut up
about his music.

But, you know, you say
     "that one incident that will
haunt him forever".

They could have restaurants,
     state rooms, it would be awesome.
Totally meant "their".

With some you need more
     time, reread them a few times,
ponder what you read.

opposed to the myth
     that blue light is scattered more
smaller waves bullshit.

Larger markets can
     be well over a million.
Those aren't feminists.

I'm not here to tell
     you "don't do it", or "my life
is amazing now".

There are simply too
     many houses for the banks
to foreclose and sell.

You can travel from
     one memory by thinking
about the other.

I wanted a team
     that I'd be able to talk
about with others.

That being said, it,
     unfortunately, didn't meet
my expectations.

If there are any
     pigeons reading this, go forth
and shit. But we aren't.

It will also be
     forced out to e delivered
by the governments.

sorry haven't been
     back on in a while because
my grandmother died.

We all feel good when
     we get messages that aren't
abusive or weird.

I highly doubt it.
     I have never saved a life,
nor do I plan to.

In a group setting,
     I'm constantly thinking "Am
I saying too much?

But if you can't, you
     may have list where your father
lives and his assets.

Some one Is probably
     going to steal that if you
leave it in the yard.

But seriously,
     you seem to forget that there
are other options.

It depends sometimes
     I get it slightly after
real heavy workouts.

We'd need ones showing
     that the parents are lovers,
and that they have kids.

All of the liquor
     and drugs was in the kitchen.
I'M SCARRED Interesting!

Your feet and hips should
     return back to the proper
stance after the strike.

Best insult ever.
     Depends on your playing style
and what you prefer.

I call it 'the seep'.
     your welcoming legacy
spreads shell, embrace it!

Your mental health is
     too important to entrust
to an amateur.

Stand up don't be quite.
     I don't think that's real peaceful
protesting chanting.

[deleted] When you
     got a ton of tracks it can
get messy quickly.

Why are you so mad?
     He was not being a dick.
He didn't swear at you.

Look at the numbers
     he put up, and then look who
was throwing to him.

You were in a small
     space, surrounded by people
doing the one thing.

Lucky find! im just
     going to post the cheapest
way i can think of.

[deleted] If you
     want the perfect wife, you need
to raise her yourself.

We are the problem.
     Nah, it's cool dude. Probably just
finds you repulsive.

The offices where
     the games are being held lost
power or something.

I would have never
     have known about them if you
hadn't put this up.

Whoever it is,
     that's fucking awesome. Nice find!
I agree with this.

If you find someone
     who smokes weed, snatch them up quick.
They're a rarity.

I'm changing your RES
     tag from "fuck yeah" to "Mr.
Shitty" In whose book?

He began preaching
     against them, and was then killed
by the Nation. See?

As long as you feel
     good and you're making progress,
I say keep going.

I think i even
     still have the original
box in my closet.

Hey, remember when
     she drank that water and then
made that face? Good times.

Good luck! Exactly!
     [deleted] They're the same tune,
although not sure why.

We would come across
     as "just as bad" or having
our voice heard in vain.

Oppressive may be
     too strong a word, but something
in that direction.

Did they upperclass
     fight because they felt it was
most honorable?

This is so stupid.
     [deleted] I rode my old
roommates a few times.

I could plainly see
     that with the naked eye, no
slow motion required.

Sometimes they just die.
     I hate those wings. Put bear paws
on them! flaunted what?

And he went crazy.
     Damn. Now I feel kind of bad
about the whole thing.

Yea. I don't get it.
     Just try it once and see if
your ghost comes up red.

You stalky bastard
     =P Better check that faces
and learn who they are.

That's him. There's nothing
     phoney about anything
you see on that stage.

Some quick research would
     have prevented me looking
like a moron. TIL.

In my head, I heard
     that entire article
in Ricky Jay's voice.

whatever, i want
     to see more league of legends!
Well, if you say so.

I mean I don't want
     to continue igniting
anything like it.

Thought it was bad luck
     for the groom to see the bride
before the wedding.

You probably haven't
     dealt with a lot of life yet.
That's ok, you will.

"No you don't, you like
     Taco Bell!" THESE ARE NOT FUN
TIMES, THESE ARE DARK TIMES.

[](/reggie "It will be...
     glorious") You must be new
to the internet.

What area are
     you in and what type of work
would you like to do?

That is fantastic!
     As an Oriole fan, I'm
excited for you!

If you don't question
     convention there will never
be any progress.

If China had been
     playing the atmosphere would
have been amazing.

Thus if you leave them
     in a big healthy pond, you
get big fat goldfish!!

I DIDN'T FEED AT ALL!
     That sounds awesome, but how do
you pay the mortgage?

But racism is
     just treating someone different
because of their race.

If you'd be willing
     to do three or four of those.
You can PM me.

After you click it,
     on the left there is a small,
medium, and large.

So annoyed! It used
     to be the second cheapest
and most convenient.

Fuck you, I know how
     to tell a joke, and this is
the version I know.

Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
     Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.

Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
     Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.

what is wrong with you
     Gallagher! You're still willing
to have sex with me.

Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
     Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.

Nothing wrong with that.
     You bring great pride to the New
Lunar Republic.

I don't know Pentax
     really well, but I would stay
away from Sigma.

Leaving a dog out
     in the heat is cruel and needs
to be dealt with now.

Everyone uses
     -current on their laptops, desktops
or even servers.

I am not a good
     doctor also I'm a goat.
[deleted] Dam strait!

I guess even god
     wanted to see a third match
and forced a remake.

THEY CALL IT SCRANTON.
     WHAT? Yep I didn't think it would
have been that easy.

Can we already
     forget about all this gay
stuff cad change topics?

Now how about you
     tell us what you were doing
before he grabbed you.

Please, message me what
     company it is, and I'll
invest stock in it.

When I suck on his
     fingers like I'm sucking his
cock, he loses it.

You're right, it can be
     viewed that way too but you didn't
answer my question.

Says the guy who keeps
     posting image links that no
one is clicking on.

Yep. That's pretty much
     what happened to me, mine is
up to date as well.

He's there every year
     with a coffin converted
into a cooler.

How about the fact
     that there are people who think
being gay is wrong?

She's a fucking bitch,
     and it has nothing to do
with entitlement.

People are more than
     welcome to join us, we hang
out and drink a bit.

If i were Zach G.
     i would do it and see if
anyone caught me.

That's why math courses
     usually have a higher
workload for homework.

TIL that the safety
     dance isn't actually a dance,
but it was still fun!

So long as they still
     use numbers, no harm is done.
Mighty Men Movers.

I'm always amazed
     by how much people care what
*I* eat or don't eat.

You've earned a viewer
     for life. Solid play, Andre.
Likely. Watch both shows.

"I swing a bit less".
     No, there's no worries. This will
be built. Strange Brew, eh?

Sorry to hear that,
     I guess having some standards
is too much for you.

And eventually
     all of the control will be
handed to one man.

The AI is really
     good and can hear you sneaking
up on them sometimes.

I guess I'm looking
     for practical advice on
dealing with regret.

i see commenting
     as erecting warning signs
for the unwary.

and Tasteless doesn't
     miss a beat and just agrees
and then continues?

That's how everyone
     can be happy with their tents
and stuff. Yeah you can!

I really did not
     expect to love this as much
as I did, well done!

My hair makes very
     little sense, I think it's from
the afghani part.

Plus, he is playing
     only Customs and he is
talking in Polish.

Toxic Avenger?
     I would shell out a few bucks
for that. Lol.

It is probably just
     because the horizontal
are so popular.

Then again, I tend
     to go for the things not on
the trend. Pain, mostly.

Laws that prohibit
     people from doing something
never works. Ever.

And they are using
     the *existing* shareholders'
money to do it.

Wow! That's cool. So, did
     you identify as "straight
but not narrow" or...?

I understand their
     concern, and I will show them
my receipt if asked.

Awesome it'll be done.
     I walk past it everyday
on my way to work.

Actually, yes it does.
     United Democratic
Federation. Now.

When she talks about
     Janelle like that, she lets Dan
talk her out of it.

would bang all of them
     but that one last What do you
think it could be like?

I use a sweepstakes
     site that lists sweepstakes for me.
I win quite a bit.

Yum. [deleted] It's
     not unthinkable, it's just
exceedingly rare.

Only during job
     interviews does sweating add
confidence for me.